What a fun weekend!

I went to see one of my best friends this weekend in Mobile, AL. Tiffany is one of those people who, when you first meet them, instantly become a lifelong friend. I just love her! She is an awesome person - full of life and love and every good thing! You can definitely see the Light of Christ in her! I want to be like her when I grow up!!!! :-D

We had a blast! For me, just being able to get away from my everyday life was a wonderful blessing. I needed some time away. I think I may be making regular trips to Mobile - it's an easy drive and it's just good to have somewhere to escape to. I'm so glad I went.

Last week was such a struggle emotionally and spiritually for me, and God allowed me some "down time". Now, I'm just trying to prepare myself for the next thing He is bringing into my life. I've learned to not get too complacent about things. Just about the time I try to settle down into a mode of operation, He seems to bring something new into my world. Don't get me wrong - I'm glad He's moving! Life is definitely interesting these days.

While I was in Mobile, we went to a Christian bookstore and I found this great devotional I'm going to start. (Maybe tonight, but probably tomorrow.) The title of the devotional is "A heart that dances" by Catherine Martin. It is an eight-week, daily devotional that focuses on building a deeper relationship with God. In the midst of all the things going on in my life, I've heard God clearly tell me that I need to learn what it means to be intimate with Him. I'm excited and a little anxious - even though I know I have no reason to be anxious. I long to know God more, and I know that it will cost me. Yes, it is crazy to even worry about what it will cost me - the reward of knowing my Lord is worth more than anything else. But there is a process of dying to self that has to be worked through in order to know a deeper relationship with God. And that is the part that scares me. After all, I've been the one in control for most of my life. Even when I gave my life to Christ at the age of 14, I didn't fully allow Him to be Lord of my life. The time has come now, however, that He has to be Lord of all or not at all. I must trust Him - nothing else matters.

So, the fear of living an unfulfilled life, empty of God's passion and fire, is greater than the fear of giving up whatever God requires of me to know Him intimately. Therefore, I am setting out on that journey. I'm striking out on the path set before me, looking always to my Guide for instructions. I know that He will take me places I could not even begin to imagine. I also know that the momentary pain of losing things I deem "valuable" will be replaced with the joy and peace that comes with an intimate relationship with God.

I can't wait to see where this adventure will take me.

My weekly update...

Apparently, I am only going to update this thing once a week! I think my problem is I've started a written journal, so most of my thoughts are going there and I have nothing for the blog. My thoughts are too personal to share with the world right now.

I will say this - when God starts working in your life, hold on! I've never been to such deep places with God as I have in the past few weeks. It's amazing. Yesterday I was telling a friend that there are times I wish I was just a "pew pickle" - you know, those people who come and do their "Christian duty" by appearing at church when the doors open, but have no real spiritual depth?!?! But then, when I think that the Creator of the Universe wants to spend time with me, taking me to deep levels of fellowship with Himself, I am overwhelmed. How can I ever wish for anything less? Wow.

God's been really working on me. Don't ever think you've got your stuff together - that's a sure invitation for God to prove otherwise! :) I'm in a period of waiting. There are a couple of things He's doing in my life, but they're not happening right now, so I must wait. In the meantime, God's been trying to get me to really learn to trust Him and make the most of the time I have right now. Too many times I get caught up and consumed with what might come down the road and forget to thank God for what is happening right now. I end up not enjoying each moment He blesses me with. If I'm not careful, I will also miss out on other things He wants to bring into my life. I don't want to miss anything that comes from God.

So...I'm re-focusing on some things He has me involved with right now. I think that when I give myself to those things, the time I spend being involved with them will bring me closer to those other things I'm waiting for. All I know is that I can't wait to see how God brings it all to pass.

There's no doubt about it - the Christian life can be hard at times, but it is never dull!

The fragile heart

I never understood how fragile the human heart really is - until the last couple of weeks.

I have a friend who is struggling with a broken relationship. It wasn't a long relationship, but she had poured all she is into it, hoping that her uniqueness and great qualities (which are numerous!) would be enough to help him overcome his broken heart and feelings for a former girlfriend. That never works. Now she is devastated and is near the point of giving up. Literally.

Fortunately, (or unfortunately) I've been there before, so I know what she's feeling. I wish I could make her see that she will come through and that there is hope. We can't change people. They will either love us or they won't. But if we have given everything we are to God, we will be protected and will be able to guard our heart. Does that mean it won't hurt? Heck, no. But - you can go on and not be shattered into a million pieces because of that other person's choices. God must come first.

That's what I learned from my past relationship. I have to guard my heart. I can't allow myself to go to those places of want and desire until God opens the door. I must deal with what is and be honest with myself - and with God. Over the years, I've really come to know that God is not bothered by my questions or the frustrations that I scream out to Him. I think He's glad when I do that, because it means I recognize His ability to make a difference - and my inability to do anything about it. The key is to learn to stop long enough to hear what He has to say back. I don't do that well. But even when I don't stop to hear His voice, He still manages to get His point across and I end up growing closer to Him. How awesome it is to know the Creator of the Universe cares that much about me.

Today, I was praying for my friend and something strange happened. Have you ever been praying for someone and the very words you used to pray for their need become directed at you, and you realize God means that prayer for you as well? That's what happened. I was praying these words: "God, help her to know that if she will give those passions and desires to You, You will take them and give them back in ways far above what she could ever dream or imagine." I was walking back up the steps to my office when I prayed that and nearly fell down to my knees because I was so overcome by God's presence. I've never experienced anything like it. I knew that those words were for her AND me. I believe the Holy Spirit gave me those words, because I've never prayed that before for anyone. It was awesome and yet, I was so strongly reminded that I have to give my everything to God. I can trust Him with it all - including my heart. He will treat it gently and with great care and hold it for just the right time for me to give it to someone else. I am still pondering the implications of that prayer and God's message to my own heart.

What a day. Ladies, guard your hearts. Turn them over to the One who will keep them safe until a man worthy of it comes along. We think we know when a guy is worthy, but we're just kidding ourselves. Our vision is limited and blurred by the trash of this world. We must trust the One who created us and knows for whom we were created. Who else besides the Manufacturer knows what's best for His creation? And fellas, you do the same. Give your heart to the Creator and let Him lead you when it comes to relationships. He won't lead you wrong. Just listen to His voice and trust His judgment, not your own.

Man, it's been a while!

I'm sure lots of folks have quit checking my blog since my posts are so few and far between. Trust me, it's not because there isn't anything happening - I'm just not at a place where I can talk about it. There may be much to say soon.

In other news - for some reason, my Youth Group keeps coming back! I am amazed. They are a great group of kids and I really feel inadequate for the task. I'm always asking God "What were you thinking!?!?!?!" I hate to think what they are missing out on simply because I'm new at this whole "youth minister" thingy. Oh well, I guess I'll keep pouring out my love on them and doing what I know to do - God can obviously take care of the rest of it!

14 DAYS!!!! Hope you are all keeping up with the election news. If you are undecided, please read, read and read some more. There are tons of references out on the net and on the radio for hearing what the real truth is! Don't be swayed by slick words and empty promises. Compare the records of both candidates and make your decision from that! God bless George Bush and God bless America!!!

Waiting...

I hate waiting. In my mind, it seems like I do that a lot, but I'm sure I don't have to wait for things any longer than most folks.

I'm trying to learn how to live in the here and now...to enjoy the moments I have right now and not waste them looking ahead to what is coming. I'm afraid to think of the things I've missed because I was too busy standing on my toes, straining to see into tomorrow and what it would bring. I'm sure I've missed hearing God's voice many times because I have been pre-occupied with what may or may not happen.

*sigh*

I know God is in control and that because I've committed myself to Him, He will bring good things into my life. He can see the big picture and He knows how everything works out. At the same time, I can see where He is working and how He could be bringing those things into my life. That's where my struggle lies - seeing what He's doing on one side and on the other side - what that could mean. "X" could happen, but will it? He could be doing "X" in my life, but is that where He's taking me?

It's a bit like driving down an unfamiliar road...you know that the road goes down over the next hill and you can see where it comes up on the next hill - but you have no idea what the road between those two points is like. It could turn a little, take you over a lake or through some trees or it could simply be a straight path from one hill to the next. You know the road is there - there are no signs that it's out - you just don't know exactly what it's like. That's where I am. I can see where I am and I think I know where I'll end up (at least on the next hill!) but I just don't know the journey from here to there. So I have to wait and see the path as I'm traveling on it.

I just hope I'll take some time to view the scenery along the way.

The writing on the wall....

Yesterday was unbelievable. I have been put on probation for 30 days. Never in my life, have I had this kind of "discipline" at a job. Needless to say, I was floored.

Now, to be honest, I have been a bit distracted and not nearly as focused on my job as I should have been, and that has resulted in some mistakes on my part. I admit that, and I am working on improving that. But apparently, it has been so bad that my boss feels a need to take this action. Personally, I think it is a bit much....ok, a bit TOO much. I mean, I just had a review in August! How terrible could I have gotten in one month? I just don't understand.

Fortunately, it's not an "official" probation - there isn't any paperwork being filled out and it's not going through our home office. This is just something between us. He wants to see an improvement in my attitude (which he said has been better since our golf tournament) and he wants to see that I am more focused in my work. Well, ok....I can do that!

My pastor spoke last night to our congregation about the attacks that seem to be coming against a lot of our members. It would seem that we are making a difference in the Kingdom, and the enemy of our souls is not pleased. Perhaps this is just another front of his attack.

Regardless of the cause, in the midst of it all I still heard God telling me it was all ok and He is working it all out. I know beyond any shadow of doubt that my time here is coming to an end....I just don't know how, where or when. But you know what? That's ok. I have surrendered my life to God and if all of this turmoil is part of what He's doing in my life, I can make it. He'll give me just what I need, when I need it.

I'm just going to put a smile on my face and do what's expected of me.

That's just the way it is.....

I cannot believe it has happened again!

I am without my computer once again. Yes, the logic board has once again failed and I couldn't use my laptop. Hopefully, they will replace the logic board with a new, updated version. Rick, the owner of the local Mac dealership/service location, said that Apple has been replacing the boards this time with a new version. I'm hoping this will take care of the problem and I won't have to deal with it again!

In my opinion, there is no better computer you could have than a Macintosh. I've used PC's for 12 years now, and I have never had a computer that just "works" so well! Other than the logic board (which is a hardware problem) I've not had any issues with my Mac! In fact, I can use it at the office and save files to our network and then be able to open them up on my pc. It's seamless!!! I just love my Mac....and I'm going to miss it over the next few days. :(

My favorite time of the year...

I love the fall!!! Although we're not fully into the season, you can feel its' presence. It is coming soon! Most people would say that the springtime represents a time of "renewal" or it brings about a sense of "newness" and "new beginnings" for them, but the fall does that for me. I don't really know why. I can be weird sometimes. :) Sometimes, I just like to be different!

In my mind (and my experience), exciting stuff seems to happen in the fall. I think it's because the change that takes place is so evident - the leaves change and eventually fall from the trees, the air is cooler and crisper, and the days aren't nearly so long. Of course, you have to wear warmer clothes and you also get to light the fire in the fireplace. Perhaps it is the sense of closeness that comes from having to dress warmer and stay inside that I really like. Don't get me wrong- I like being outside - but I also like being inside with family and friends - and you definitely spend more time with people once the weather changes!

Another reason I love the fall is because it brings my favorite holiday - Thanksgiving! Of course, it hasn't always been my favorite. As a child, no holiday could ever compete with the decorations and excitement of receiving gifts from Santa! But as I've grown older, my holiday allegiance has switched to Thanksgiving. I guess I don't get enough of spending time with family and friends. (Well, with a few exceptions!!) But I just love being able to sit around and talk with family, share what's going on in each other's lives, see how much the kids have grown and reflect on "the good 'ole days". In addition, the food is usually good, too! :)

So it's that time of year again, and I am very excited. I'm waiting to see what this fall brings...perhaps there will be another reason to add to my list!

Time to prepare

Do you ever wish that you could just get a glimpse of what it is God is doing "behind the scenes" of your life? I know that if He were to give me that glimpse, I'd probably run away screaming, but today, I just wish I had a clue what He is up to. I'm sure I should just be thankful that He is moving and working. Don't get me wrong - I am very thankful! I just don't like not knowing what's up.

One thing I am sure of - He keeps telling me to trust and wait and in the meantime, prepare myself. Well, that begs the question...prepare for what? That's what I'm trying to figure out!

My pastor challenged us yesterday to spend this week re-examining our perceptions of who God really is and compare those with what the Bible says. I want to know God. I want to know Him like I've never known Him, because He is my everything. It's kind of funny - the theme scripture God gave me for the youth group is John 15:5 -

"I am the vine, you are the branches. Those who remain in me, and I in them, will produce much fruit. For apart from me, you can do nothing."

Apparently, God is helping me learn to live this verse, for I am reminded of it frequently, and am having to learn how to remain in Him.

I think I'm traveling a new segment of my faith-walk, and my journey is taking me through a part of the countryside I've never seen before. I can hardly appreciate the scenery for being bothered by the fact I'm in a new place. Isn't that silly?!?! I want to relish today and not waste it wondering about tomorrow, but it is hard - especially when there are things I have to deal with today that I'm tired of dealing with.

I just want some clear direction, but perhaps the more time I spend getting to know God, the less concerned I'll be with where it is He's taking me.

TGIF

All I want to say is that I'm glad it's Friday. It's been a long week and I'm beat! Maybe I'll have something more interesting to say later. :)

Sailing along

Just wanted to say that things are going much better this week. This week I'm having to close out our two golf tournaments, so I'm staying busy - and staying out of trouble! :) God is good...that's all I know!

One thing I've got to do is get back into my regular personal schedule. This past week-and-a-half has really thrown a cog in my wheel! I haven't worked out in almost two weeks now and I've been staying up until 12 or 1am every night! I don't know what's wrong with me, but I can't keep it up. I'm excited that I'll get to the gym this afternoon. I need a hard workout!

In addition to my physical health, I've got to get back in the groove of studying the Word. I've not been reading God's Word nearly enough because of my busy schedule, and I can tell it! Good grief! I am too easily distracted from doing the important stuff!

Well, time to get back to the helm...

I am proud to introduce...

My pastor has hit the blogosphere!!! His blog is going to be quite a read - I can assure you! You may love him - you may hate him, but I'll bet once you start reading, you won't be able to quit!

I feel like I've had some part in the birth of his blog. Randy's been reading my posts since I began my blog last year and I'd like to think I had some influence in his decision to join this world of thoughts and ideas. You know - I do what I can! :)

Anyway, I look forward to seeing what happens.

A quiz for everything...

Thanks to Rick for this new quiz. I haven't done one of these in a while so I thought it would be fun.

Take the quiz: "WHAT RELIGION BESTS SUITS YOU?"

True Christian
You are humble, gracious, kind and extremely Christ-like. You believe in the bible as your law, but read it in its original language. Perhaps you're not a scholar, but you're not an amateur either. You normally don't feel church is acceptable for your form of worship, and if anyone believes different from you, you might try to learn something from them.

I don't know how to read the Bible in it's original language, but I think the rest of it is fairly accurate. How funny!

loneliness

it's amazing to me how you can be surrounded by people and still feel lonely. it just sneaks up on you, busts through the door and sets up camp. eeeck. i'll be glad when it leaves. hopefully it won't be here long and there will be a long time before it shows up again.

Sometimes, it just gets old

I think the one thing I most dislike about being single is having to take care of everything for myself. If my car needs work, I have to make sure it happens. When something I own breaks, I have to fix it or get a new one.

Even though I have two roommates, I tend to be the one in the house that fixes things. It's not my roommate's fault, it's just the way it is. They even have a nickname for me. They've started calling me "Walgreens" (that's a drug store chain here in the south.) If anyone needs something, I usually have it - from bandaids and batteries to coaxial cables and extension cords. I don't understand how that happened. I guess I'm just weird.

Starting last week, our bathtub started backing up. I guess I shouldn't be surprised since there are three girls living in the house. Well, the day before yesterday it was backing up and staying backed up for a long time. We happened to have a little bit of this stuff called "Liquid Fire." Have you ever heard of the stuff?!!? It's truly amazing, but gosh it stinks!!! Basically it is sulfuric acid and it will remove any clog you have! So I used the little bit we had, hoping it would take care of the problem. Uh...no. Not gonna happen.

Well, today, I go and get a new bottle and when I got home, I poured half of it down the drain, waited the prescribed 15 minutes and started the cold water running down the drain. "Aha," I thought, "it worked!" But within seconds, I realized I had jumped the gun. The tub promptly began to fill up and the water wouldn't budge.

After consulting with my mom about her experience with the stuff, I decided to use the rest of the bottle. The directions say to wait until all the water had drained out, but if I had done that, I'd still be waiting. So I started pouring a little bit down the drain (the stuff went straight down the drain - it didn't even mix with the water sitting in the tub!) Then, I took the plunger and started pumping the drain. After going back and forth - pouring and pumping - the water finally went down and I poured the rest of the Liquid Fire down the drain. I waited another 15 minutes and, voila! Success!!!!! I must admit, I was proud of myself. For all of my wishing I didn't have to always tend to things, I do have a sense of pride when I can "fix" a problem.

Needless to say, it will be nice when one day I can let someone else tend to those kinds of things. At least, I hope I will marry someone who can tend to those kinds of things. :) I don't mind doing "fix-it" jobs around the house, it just would be nice to not be the only one to do it. *sigh* I guess I need to be grateful I can do those things, but like I said - sometimes it just gets old.

When in doubt, apologize

My mom gave me some good advice this morning. She told me that I should probably apologize for yesterday, whether I felt I was at fault or not. So I did. And she was right. It was the thing to do. All is well here today and we'll be just fine.

But...

I'm still not sure about the future. We'll see what God has in store for me. In the meantime, I'll keep on doing what I'm doing and wait on God. :)

Today, I nearly walked away

Change is in the air. Just as sure as I know my name, I know that some major changes are coming in my life. What does that mean? I really have no idea, but, for some time, I've known that I would not stay at my current job forever. It has bothered me a bit, to be honest. After all, God called me to this job. His fingerprints are all over the job and how He brought me to it, and I know that He has me there for a reason. So when I started having thoughts about moving on (about nine months to a year ago) I thought it was just me and that I was being silly.

Now I'm not so sure.

The past several weeks have really been a struggle for me. Just for the record, I love what I do and have thoroughly enjoyed my job. But I have really been struggling with thoughts of not wanting to do it anymore. The last time I experienced these feelings was when I changed jobs and began to work at my current postition. Needless to say, it's a little scary. I think God may be working in me to prepare me, but for what....I don't know.

So today, I almost quit. No joke. I have never had a week like this one. Without going into too much detail, let's just say it's been stressful. We had a major event yesterday and have another one on Monday. My boss graciously gave me the first half of the day off, so I got into work at lunchtime. Yesterday, there were some problems and we had a little "discussion" at the event that didn't help things (on my end) but we got past that and everything was fine today. I came in and started right to work on getting past yesterday's event. My boss told me what he wanted to get done, so I was working on those things. Toward the end of the day, I was working on stuff for next week when he came to my desk and asked me "How's it looking?" which really means - what are you working on and where are you with it. I got so frustrated. I started to just say "fine" but I just sighed, looked up at him and asked him "what do you want me to tell you?" It wasn't the the question itself that he asked me, it was the way he asked me. Again, I don't want to go into too much detail and beat a dead horse (to quote a friend of mine) but the end result was we got into another "discussion" in which my boss asked me if I enjoyed my job. I told him, "not this week" and he asked me if I wanted to do something else. I actually hesitated for a split second (or two) before I said, "no. I like what I do." But I must admit - I felt very disingenuous.

Now, let me pause and say that I couldn't believe he asked me that question. Truthfully, I do enjoy my job and I have never had so much "trouble" as I've had this week. The guys I work for are very good about telling me how much they appreciate me and thank me on a regular basis for the things I do for them. And, as far as I know, I've never given any indication that I'd rather be somewhere else - because I haven't ever felt that.....until this week.

Anyway, we "had it out", so to speak, and I think we're ok or will be ok. I'm sure once we get past next week's event, we'll have a meeting to discuss this week. My boss likes to discuss things. I'm praying about it - asking God to show me where I was at fault or need to change and how I need to respond to my boss. I don't know what it all means. I've never been this disatisfied with my current job and I don't know for sure where this feeling is coming from. All I do know is this - God let me get absolutely miserable in my last job so that I would even think of looking elsewhere. I don't want to have to get to that point again. If He has somewhere else for me to be, I'm ready to go there. I'll do whatever He wants me to do and go wherever He wants me to go.

In spite of the unease of this week, I know that God is in control. He is doing something within me and perhaps this is just a by-product of that. Everytime there is growth in my spiritual life, every other area of my life is directly affected. My life started changing in major ways when I became the youth director at my church. Only God knows where it will all end up.

The hurricane cometh!

Although I live in central Mississippi, we will feel the effects of the hurricane before the week is out. You would not believe the traffic coming from the south!!! I have a friend from Mobile who was traveling to McComb, MS with her parents last night. She called me around 9:30 to get an update on the weather and told me they had traveled about 2 miles in as many hours! My uncle and aunt left Gautier at 7:30 pm and made it to my parent's house at 5:30 this morning - a trip that would normally be 3 hours, tops!!!! Unbelievable!

It appears this is going to be a very rough storm. Keep all those people who live on the coast in your prayers. I know they all pray they will have a home when it's over.

Spiderman in church

I just love kids. They are truly unique! Today in church, my nephew provided one of those "Kodak moments" for which you wish you had a video or digital camera to record it.

A couple in our church officially joined today, so after giving his intro and speaking to the couple, our pastor asked everyone to stand and extend their hand towards them as he prayed over them. My roommate was standing next to my four-year-old nephew and just happened to look over at him as everyone was extending their hands. She about lost it when she noticed his arm was extended and his hand was in the "spray web" gesture made popular by Spiderman and acted out by kids across this nation pretending to be him.

Of course, she elbowed her sister and she about lost it too. By then, other people on the pew noticed and were chuckling under their breath. What makes it so funny is that he wasn't trying to be funny! He was sincerely reaching his hand out in prayer. It's just that he is such a Spiderman freak, it comes out in the smallest ways. You should see the way he jumps around the house.

Since none of our family actually saw my nephew's actions, we got a good laugh when my roommate shared the story.

A little change

I decided to use the comment feature provided by blogger.com, so any comments left prior to today will not be available. I think this feature will be more functional.

Also - I've enabled the feature that will allow you to email any of my posts to a friend. Go ahead, spread the love! :) Feel free to share any of my wit and wisdom with your friends! Ha!

I highly recommend...

This is the best cd I've listened to in quite some time. It is simply beautiful. The name of the group is "Amici Forever" and the title of the cd is "The Opera Band".

If you like opera, this is a fabulous cd to add to your collection. But - even if you're not really that fond of opera music, I still think you would like this cd. Anyone who loves and can appreciate good music will like this cd. I guarantee it.

How do I know? Well, the only reason I even found this cd was because one of the songs on it was playing in the background at Borders bookstore. It was so incredible, that as I was walking through the music section, I came to a complete stop when I heard it playing. I immediately flagged down a sales associate to tell me what cd was playing. I'm telling you - it is just that good!

Of course, music always speaks to me. I can be in a crowd of hundreds of talking people and still be able to zero in on music that is playing. I thank God for His gift of music in my life. I hope I can pass that along to others in some way.

Don't just do something....sit there!

This was the title of my pastor's message on Sunday. It was based on 1 Samuel 13 where Saul jumps the gun and is disobedient to God because he didn't think things were moving along fast enough. Because of his taking charge and doing things his way, he ended up losing the kingdom and ultimately the presence of God in his life - and didn't even realize when He had left! Yikes! It is another confirmation in my life that God is teaching me to wait....and listen....and trust...and totally surrender everything to Him...and did I mention, wait? I told a friend tonight that I wish God would just quit talking to me (NOT REALLY!) I'm very glad to know that God is speaking to me. Means I'm still "in"! :)

Seriously though, each day that goes by just reinforces what I hear God speaking in my heart. The other day, I posted about surrendering everything to God, but I have since realized that I've just begun that journey. Silly of me to think that it was a one-time "surrendering" and then all would be right in the world. Ha! I now see the foolishness of my wisdom - I don't have as much as I thought I did! Surrendering is a daily, no wait....hourly....oops, wrong again...minute by minute thing! At least for me it is. I will admit, there are stretches of my day where it isn't an issue, but that's usually because at that moment I don't have time to sit around and think about things. I get into trouble when I have free time. :)

Today, we had a staff meeting, and my boss had us pair up and put into practice Romans 12:15, which says, "Rejoice with those who rejoice; mourn with those who mourn." He asked us to share something we were rejoicing over with our partner and then pray for one another, specifically mentioning them by name. I shared with my co-worker that I am excited by what I see God doing in my life. This whole lesson in trusting and surrendering is exciting to me - even though it is at times painful. Just the other day, I was really struggling. I was feeling depressed and just didn't want to be around others or do anything. So, I started examining my heart to determine what was really the core issue. I made myself think of all the things God has done in my life and began to thank Him for those things. Then I asked myself why was I depressed. The thought went through my head that "Christy" was having a hard time dying. That part of me that has been warring with God over this whole surrender issue was not happy and was making me miserable. All I could do after that was laugh at myself. One of these days, I'll look back over this period of my life and think how silly I was for all of my attitudes and struggles. At least I hope I will. But for now, I am a bit glad for the struggle - it means that something is happening. I guess it really is like childbirth (although I don't know the reality of that experience!) If there wasn't the struggle and pains of labor, there would not be the birth of a child. And, so I'm learning, that is true in our spiritual life as well. If we are not feeling the pain of being outside of our "comfort zone" and having what is comfortable taken from us, then we probably aren't really walking in the path God has set for us.

Anyway, I will continue to learn to sit and wait on God and listen closely for the sound of His still, small voice so that when He does speak, I will be ready to do what He asks. Oh, I can hardly wait! :)

What a nice guy

I live in an interesting neighborhood. It is in a part of town that was once the prime neighborhood of doctors, lawyers and the upper echelon of society. These days, it is the dividing line between the last section of our city that is considered upper class and the ghetto. Literally. I live on a main street - which is always busy - and if you go over a couple of streets in one direction, you can find any type of drug, prostitue and den of iniquity you can imagine. A couple of streets over in the other direction, you'll find some people from the artsy segment of our local society as well as a few doctors, lawyers, young couples just starting out and a rather substantial homosexual population. As I said, it is an interesting neighborhood and I love being a part of it!

So tonight, I went to the grocery store in the center of this neighborhood to pick up a few things. This store is an interesting establishment in itself. Located in the strip next to it is an old-time drug store (that still sells milkshakes in the tall soda glass), an antique store and a novelty store that sells decorative items. I think there may be one other store, but I can't remember for sure. Needless to say, the people who shop at this grocery store tend to be regular visitors - not because the store is modern or offers a wide selection of items - but because it is in a central location. Very convenient. Anyway, because of the neighborhood (remember the rough section of the hood?) every night there is an officer from the Sherrif's department standing guard. The guy is huge! He must be about 6'10", african-american, looks to be in good shape, and is obviously not someone you would want to tie up with. In spite of his appearance, he is the most awesome guy! Every time I go into that store, I've seen him go way beyond his duty as an officer and pitch in and help bag groceries, direct store traffic or tell folks where to find things. Tonight I went in there and the store was way short in staff, so the line began to build up. The man jumped right in there directing those people with just a few items over to the Information Desk to get checked out and was helping to bag people's groceries. I watched him as he talked with several people as he did his thing. There was this old couple in there who he apparantly knew and he yelled out to gentleman, "Hey, Pop!!" It was so cool! What was even more awesome was to see how the other people waiting in line began to smile at each other and went out of their way to be courteous in the difficult circumstances. It was almost like a scene right out of a Norman Rockwell painting! How cool is that?

I'm almost positive the man knows Christ. You don't see people going out of their way like that unless they have a knowledge of true love...the knowledge of a Man who died to save us all. As I was walking out of the store, this officer had resumed his position at the door, so I stopped to tell him how much I appreciated his willingness to go above and beyond the call of duty. What a blessing he was to me because of his actions. I can only hope that I would inspire someone else in the same way.

This could get interesting...

I don't know what God is doing, but He's up to something! I know He's been working in my life, but today our pastor shared that he felt God was telling him we (our congregation) should get ready.

"Ready for what?"

*crickets chirping in the background*

I've also sensed this in my own life. We've been seeing some incredible growth that can only be attributed to a move of God. I mean, we haven't done anything special - except of course, be available to be used by God.

As I mentioned in my last post, I'm in a new place in my walk with God, but today I sensed that I've only scratched the surface. I was driving home, contemplating all the things that have been happening, and reflecting on how I feel like I am in a place of brokenness, when the thought ran through my head - you've only just begun. Yikes! What do you mean?!?!? There's more? Does that mean it will get worse before it gets better? Oh Lord, you've got to be kidding!!!

*no answer*

I know what He's telling me. I guess I should be glad that at least He's given me a "heads up" of sorts. All I can do - or want to do - is cling tightly to Him during this time. Like I said, this could get interesting.

Another first...

"Trust in the Lord with all your heart; lean not on your own understanding. In everything you do, acknowledge him and he will direct your path." Proverbs 3:5-6

For the first time in my life, I am actually able to live this verse. It is a wonderful place to be. I've always tried to trust God and felt like I was giving everything to Him, but I was kidding myself. This past week - I have done it.

I guess it is because I have finally surrendered everything to Him. My heart and mind are now together in understanding my need to depend on God. Does that mean I still don't have moments where I struggle with emotions or my own desires? No, not at all. But now, I have learned to deal with those emotions and desires and place them at the foot of the Cross, and yes - leave them there.

I must have Jesus. I can no longer try to live things my way. I hope I will stay in this place of brokenness. Unfortunately, I know me, and I'm sure I will have to sacrifice myself again, but for now, I am so at peace with my Lord. I know He is taking care of me and I know that I will receive His best blessings in my life.

How awesome it is to be in this place. God is so faithful and true.

One other thing...

I know my posts have been few and far between here lately, but I'm going to be better at keeping up. It's weird how not blogging leaves an empty place, but honestly, I haven't wanted to blog very much. Perhaps I just needed a break from the blogosphere, too!

God is so good

I just wanted to say that I love God more than anything. He has, once again, proven Himself to be so faithful and He has given me everything I need - just when I need it. How can I ever complain??

All praise goes to Him!

Vacation's over.

Well, it's time to go back to work. I wish I didn't have to. I could use another week off!!!! Unfortunately, our schedule at work doesn't allow for that. However, I think I'll be taking some days as soon as I can. I've got some people I need to go visit, so I won't be letting my days get wasted this year!

Anyway, it was good to be off, but I didn't get done hardly any of the things I had planned to do. I've got staff training I have to finish by next Tuesday (the 31st) and I had planned on working on that while I was off. Of course, I didn't even look at it! At this point, I don't even care. I wish I didn't have to do it at all!!! I almost don't even care that I'd get a letter in my personnel file for not getting it done. Almost. So what that means is I'll be working on it every night this week. I think I'll be able to get it finished. In fact, a couple of my staff are supposed to come to the office so I can help them get theirs done. I'll be working right alongside them! Maybe I can get most of it done at work - then my nights will be my own!!

*Sigh* So much to do, and so little time to do it!

There is some good news in my life - the youth group has taken off and seems to be exploding! I had 4 kids last Saturday, and then this weekend I had 10!!! That has to be a record somewhere! :) I am truly excited by what's taking place. It is God's work, I'm just awed that He is letting me go along for the ride! I'll try to post more on "my kids" this week.

I'm so excited!!!

I'm actually on "vacation"! Woohoo! The only bad news is that I'm not on a beach somewhere, listening to the crash of the waves on the shore. :( Nevertheless, it was sooo nice to be able to sleep in today. I won't do that again, but it was nice for once.

I need to get better at taking all of my vacation days. Alas, I will lose several days because I didn't get them in by August 31. However, this next year I will be better. Since I'm the new youth minister for my church, I will have more reasons to need days off....for things like camp, youth trips, etc. I hope we have an exciting year!

Speaking of my youth group - I love them! I see so much potential - for good and bad - and have been praying over them a lot! If I can make a difference in just one of their lives I will be SO happy! They seem to be really excited by what we have going on and I hope it will continue to be exciting for them. At our first meeting, I told them that we weren't meeting just to have something to do. I want them to learn God's purpose for their lives and be able to impact others. Needless to say, it is going to be an interesting year. I believe it!

Well, let me get back to enjoying my "vacation"!

Stop the world, I want to get off!!!

It seems like everything is speeding up! I don't know where all my time goes.

Well, the steroids and antibiotics seems to have worked - as far as stopping the stabbing pain that was going through my left temple. My doctor thinks I probably do have trigeminal neuralgia, but we won't know for sure until I have another spell. (Oh goodness, that sounds so..."old"!) Anyway, I'm disposed to think I do have it, so I can only hope that I don't experience that pain again for a LONG time! It really hurt!

So anyway - in spite of taking antibiotics for 10 days, I now have a head cold and possibly an ear infection! I mentioned it to my doctor when I saw her on Tuesday, and she said that probably means what I have is viral - and there's no treatment. I just have to wait it out. Good grief! I refuse to give in, so I've been going on about my days as usual, but by the end of the day, I'm beat!

Well, let me get back to work. I've got to do some work on my plans for the youth group AND I have about 60-70 hours worth of Staff Training I have to get in before September 1st. It's my own fault - we've had this stuff for over a year now but I never made it a priority - until now - and then only because I'll get a letter put in my personnel file. Eeck! Fortunately, I've got some days off next week. I know what I'll be doing for some of that time!

What a night!

Well, my first youth event is in the bag! It was a ton of fun and I would say a complete success. I accomplished what I set out to do - get acquainted with the young people in my youth group. I feel like I connected in some way with most of them and hope to begin the process of getting to know them better - even those who may not be a "regular" in our group but who will visit with us from time to time. Overall, I am very pleased, but I can see the long road ahead.

More than before, I was made very aware of how much I am going to have to depend on God. Over the past few weeks, I've been going over tons of things in my head - from nailing down our purpose statement (which I think I may have after tonight) all the way to the logisitics of actually ministering to and meeting with these kids and what that will look like. But when we all came together as a group, I realized that I had been making my plans on my understanding of the way things are - of the spiritual depth of each of these kids, of their personalities, of God's plan for their lives, of my response to them...

All of it, of course, was wrong. How could I ever think my understanding would be right? After all, the only thing I knew about most of these kids was what I'd seen of them at church. Duh. With the exception of a couple of the kids, I don't really know anything about their home life, their experience with God or the church, and I certainly don't know what they like or dislike - all of these things (and more) have made them who they are. Only God knows their hearts and His will for their lives.

So all the scenarios and plans I'd been mulling over in my mind have been trashed or at the very least are up for a serious re-examination. I am truly going to have to be open at all times to what God is speaking to me. I may experience something in my day that God wants me to use to reach these kids or that will give me insight into what's happening in their lives. I don't know what it is they need, but He does.

In spite of my discovery, I'm still very excited! I can't wait to see God use these young people to impact others.

What's the deal?

Is it just me or has this been an unusually strange week for everyone? I don't know if it's the drugs I'm taking or just plain being tired, but I can't figure it out. I'm having a hard time even putting my thoughts together about it all.

My mother has two brothers in the hospital with serious health conditions, and we just found out my dad's brother died tonight. This opens up a whole new area of my life I don't really want to deal with yet. My uncle was a diabetic but died from a heart attack. This year had been really tough for him. How does this directly affect me? My dad is also a diabetic, and it is getting more obvious, at least to me and my mom, that his health is slowly dwindling. It is not something we really want to deal with or think about.

I guess it's just another aspect of life, but here in America, we don't really talk about it, do we? With all the advancements in technology and science, we've learned how to extend our lives so that we don't die until we're much older. Unlike other countries, where death is a fact of daily life - either because of poor living/health conditions or war - death in America, for most people, only happens every now and then.

The one thing that comforts me is knowing that my father has given his life to Christ and will be in heaven when he dies. Same thing is true for my mom. I don't know how people without faith in God deal with death. I cannot imagine it. Wouldn't want to imagine it, really.

It's funny, just a little earlier tonight, before I found out about my uncle, I was thinking through this very issue of eternal life and the security I have in knowing Christ. In my mind, while I was eating dinner, I was having a conversation with an unbeliever. It was kind of strange - I wasn't trying to convince the person that I was right or that they were wrong. I was simply telling them that I knew what was in my future and hoped they were sure about their choice. I guess, when it comes down to it, we don't have to convince people of the truth of God's word (since they wouldn't understand it anyway without God revealing it to them.) I just have to be ready to give an answer for the hope I have within me. If I'm living my life to know Christ and His spirit is within me, others will know there is something different about me and be curious as to the cause. I wonder how many people would be "won to the Lord" if more Christians simply lived a life of confidence in their Savior. I've often been challenged by the Holy Spirit as to whether or not I'm going to live like I truly believe God's word - that means even in the small stuff...especially in the small stuff.

Well, it's a lot to ponder and I'm tired. Just wanted to share those thoughts. Be sure to take full advantage of the time you have with those you love. We truly are not guaranteed tomorrow.

Illness was not in my vocabulary, until now

You know how you hear stories of people suffering from one ailment or another and you think, "Awww, that's too bad! I'm glad it's not me!" Well, this time it's me...maybe.

Over the past year, every once in a while, I have experienced a sharp pain shooting along the left side of my head. It would scare me, but I'd wait to see if it would do it again, and when it didn't happen, I'd go on about my day. Well, this weekend, it happened, once....twice....three times....I really began to be concerned. On top of that, I had a headache which lasted all weekend. So I decided I'd better get it checked out.

I went to see my physician - actually she's a nurse practitioner, but I really like her. Anyway, I go see my healthcare provider, tell her my symptoms and she lays a new medical term on me I'd not ever heard before. She tells me I might have trigeminal neuralgia. It is a disorder which affects the trigeminal nerve of the cranium. In plain english, the largest nerve on the side of my head is being irritated for some reason. To be accurate, I haven't been officially diagnosed as having the disorder, but the more I read about it and the more time that goes by causes me to believe she could be right. Currently, I'm taking steroids (which have left me feeling sick to my stomach until tonight) and antibiotics (which she prescribed today as a result of my labwork - my white blood count is elevated a little.)

Come to find out, my mother's aunt had this problem, also known as tic douloureaux, and had to have the nerve in her face cut to keep from being in pain. Evidently, her episodes would happen over several days and would lay her low for at least a week. According to my healthcare provider, it is something that is hereditary. Great.

Uggh! Did I mention I hate being ill? I am not a good patient and I don't like people, in general, when I don't feel well. I'm just glad most of the guys were out of the office today. :)

So my biggest frustration right now is just not knowing for sure what's wrong. I've had the shooting pains several times over the past couple of days and if they continue, I'll be going back to the doctor tomorrow. I'm praying that it's nothing and is just some freak thing, but even if it is trigeminal neuralgia, I hope that God will heal me of it. If not, I'm going to have to learn how to deal with it and learn how to be nice to people when I'm suffering. ;)

Out of the mouth of babes....

I just love kids! Especially my brother's (since I don't have any of my own!)

Tonight I went with my sister-in-law and the kids to VBS (Vacation Bible School) at the church we all used to attend. Some friends of mine are directing and teaching at the Bible school, so I called my sister-in-law to see if she wanted to take the kids. We decided to go!

The kids had a blast and we had a great time watching them! I have mixed emotions and thoughts about VBS these days. It's probably because of my issues with "religion" and anything "religious". I can't stand the thought of doing something just because it's always been done, and sometimes I feel that VBS falls into that category.

Anyway, I just felt like it was something good for the kids and that's why I suggested it to my sister-in-law. They've never experienced anything like it.

So tonight, on the way back to their house, I asked the kids what they had learned in their class. I knew they talked about Paul, so I asked what they had learned about him.

"They put him in a bakset," replied Mackenzie.

"And what did they do with him then?" I asked.

"Threw him out the window," says Hannah.

My sister-in-law and I about died laughing! In case you're not sure why, the real story is that in order to save Paul, his friends lowered him in a basket down the outside wall of the city. Needless to say, we had a blast. I was reminded of how precious and wonderful kids are and I can understand why Jesus would want them around Him. It makes me wonder what funny things were said by the children He held on His lap.

Time flies when you're having fun

I can't believe how long it's been since I last posted! There is so much going on right now! Yikes!

Well, I met with my pastor this past Sunday night to go over the Youth Ministry Plan. I was so nervous! Fortunately, it was a great experience. I don't know what I expected, but my nervousness went away almost as soon as we started discussing things. His questions helped me to get a better handle on what I'm doing and I'm even more excited. Some things he said really helped me to see myself more clearly and to not be afraid to be different in my planning and vision. Like I said - it was a great meeting.

So now, I'm working on revising my ministry plan and putting on paper more specific plans for our group. I'm still a little anxious about the first time our youth group will meet, but I am really trying to be better at listening to God and trust Him for direction.

In other news: I may have an opportunity for a really cool road trip next week. I don't want to say too much about it right now, because it might not happen, but trust me - if I get to do it, you'll be the first to know! (Ok, maybe not the first!) :)

At work things are about to really kick into high gear. School starts in about 3 weeks and then we have a golf tournament the second week in September. Next week we have a staff retreat...this is where our staff from all over the state will come together and plan for the upcoming year. It will be an interesting few weeks....months, to say the least!

Getting ever closer to the day

This Sunday, it will be officially announced that I am the Youth Minister for our church. Woohoo!

I've been working on my Youth Ministry Plan. It is overwhelming, yet so exciting. I have all these thoughts and ideas running through my mind...the hard part is sorting through all that I'm learning and planning and put it in perspective to deal with reality. You know, the reality of what is right now- not what I can see happening way out in the future. Sometimes I'm guilty of running headlong into things without really thinking it through or planning very well. I can see right now, that has got to stop!

I think the reality of what being a youth minister is has begun to set in. Today I was sharing with my friend, Kathy, that I'm realizing that I can't just wait to the last minute to do things - you don't understand how hard that is for me. I tend to procrastinate. I told Kathy that God is definitely moving me out of my "comfort zone". I don't like it, yet I want to move and grow and be more than what I am right now.

It is scary to think that while I'll be responsible for leading the youth at our church, I am still growing in my walk with Christ. Pride within me doesn't want for people to see me fall flat on my face or show the side of me that isn't quite perfect (that really is FAR from perfect!) But I know I will. I want it all to be good and perfect without any problems or issues.....I know, in a "perfect" world, right? Seriously though, I do know that problems will come - in my own life and with the ministry. I just hope that when they do, I don't crumble into a thousand pieces but run straight to the arms of my Father and trust in His strength to get me through.

The truth is, I've never really been in this place in my walk of faith; this place that puts me right out in front as an intercessor for the young people who will be in my care and a target for the enemy. It is a scary and thrilling place to be. Whoever said being a Christian was boring?!!?!?

Lessons in faith from Spider-Man

Friday night, I went to see one of the best movies I've ever seen. Seriously. In my opinion, Spider-Man 2 joins the ranks of movies like The Lord of the Rings trilogy, Star Wars (the original trilogy), ET and Super Man (the original movie) as movies that re-tell the Greatest Story Ever Told. I'm not saying these movies are a word-for-word narrative of the Gospel, but if you are paying attention, you can see the story of Christ and His sacrifice and even see reminders of life lessons that are told throughout the Bible.

*****MOVIE SPOILER***** (If you haven't seen the movie and don't want it ruined for you, stop reading now!)

For instance, in Spider-Man 2 - Peter Parker struggles with a major choice for his life. Does he do what he has been gifted to do, sacrificing all that he wants, and serve humankind as Spider-Man or does he only live to please himself? We see him go through the process of discovery to find out which choice he can live with.

I so understand his struggle. Every day, I have to choose for whom I am living - me or God. Am I going to do my own thing or will I live to fulfill the purpose God created me for? I believe it's a struggle we all deal with.

The movie's writers and director were so clear in showing what happened to Peter when he chose to live life for himself. As he struggles with this issue, he begins to lose his "powers" - sometimes his webs don't work and he's left flying through the air with nothing to catch him. Once he makes the choice to leave Spider-Man behind, he loses all his powers and becomes just like anyone else - he has no super-strength, no webs, no ability to climb walls and he even loses his sight again and has to start wearing his glasses. Interesting, isn't it?

Isn't that what happens to us when we walk outside of God's will and do things our way? We begin to stumble and fall in every area of our lives and don't have the power to overcome the smallest obstacles.

As Peter begins to live life his way everything on the outside looks good - he's able to do his homework and excel in school, keep his promises to his friends, is getting rest and even gets close to getting "the girl" - but on the inside, he knows something isn't right. He sees people in trouble and knowing he could help them, he turns away. This keeps eating at him until one night, he comes across a building on fire and even though he's no longer Spider-Man, he rushes into the building to save a child. In the process of saving the girl, he nearly gets them both killed. He tried to do the right thing on his own as Peter Parker and nearly failed. Once outside, while breathing oxygen from the paramedic's truck, he hears that there was another person who died in the fire. It is then he realizes that had he been Spider-Man, he could have saved that person.

Peter is in the process of readjusting his life to again become Spider-Man when he is confronted By Dr. Octopus. His powers, which had left him, once again begin to return and he is able to save Mary Jane from being crushed by a car. Dr. Octopus (who knows that Peter Parker has some relationship with Spider-Man because he takes Spidey's pictures) tells Peter to have Spider-Man meet him. He then tosses Peter aside and takes Mary Jane as his hostage. In that instant, when someone Peter loves is threatened, he knows he must do whatever it takes to save her. He must become Spider-Man again.

It was so interesting to me the imagery the moviemakers used to show this transformation in Peter. He steps outside the coffee shop, still wearing his glasses but everything is terribly fuzzy, so he takes them off and his vision is clear. I'll tell you, I almost started crying. Isn't it true that when we accept what it is we are called to do that our vision becomes clear? God was speaking right to me through that movie. That, in itself, is an interesting experience. As I shared in an earlier post, I know that God has called me to work with the youth, but I hadn't accepted His purpose for my life because it wasn't quite the way I thought it should be. There were (and are) things I have to give up in order to fulfill what He's called me to be. Funny thing is, once I accepted it, things have begun to come together and I see my "vision" getting clearer.

Anyway, I won't tell the rest of the movie in detail, but there is some strong imagery of the Cross and Christ's sacrifice in the film. Very cool. The other awesome part of the story is that even though Peter gave up his desires, when he became Spider-Man and began to live out his purpose, he still got what he wanted. Isn't that what the Bible says? "Delight yourself in the Lord, and He will give you the desires of your heart." Psalm 37:4

So there you have it. My humble ramblings about lessons in faith from Spider-Man. God is truly amazing. He can even use a movie to reinforce His message.

What a great day!

Well, I thought turning 31 would mean my birthday wouldn't be anything special. I was wrong! My birthday turned out a lot better than I expected!

My friend, Kathy, who has been working with us part-time, got to work before I did and left me a bunch of "happys" on my desk. I was so shocked to walk in and see a plant (I call it my "Birthday Tree" - it's a big one!), gift basket and a gift bag on my desk. I thought she had told the guys in the office about my birthday and they managed to get their gifts their early - but all that was from her! In addition to those gifts, she took me to lunch. Kathy is a wonderful friend!

But the fun didn't end there!

After lunch, I received two flower arrangements! I've never gotten this many flowers in my life!!! One of the guys on my staff, and his wife, sent me a cute bouquet of flowers and my precious friend, Tiffany, (you know who you are!) sent me another arrangement that was simply beautiful! I was so overwhelmed!

It was just a great day and I really felt special. Not only did I get those thoughtful gifts, but I received many phone calls and emails from family and friends. I'm so terrible about remembering birthdays, I always feel guilty when people remember mine! That will have to change if I'm going to be a good youth leader! I really should do it so I'll be a better "friend" to my friends!!!

Sometimes we think the small things we do for people don't amount to much, but I believe those are the things that count the most. I think my favorite "gift" of the whole day was a handmade card from Kathy's granddaughter. Trishten is nine and just came back from youth camp a couple of weeks ago, deeply impacted by Christ moving in her heart. Kathy told me there was a song they sung during camp that Trishten especially liked, so I made her a cd containing some great worship music - and this song ("Here I Am to Worship"). Evidently, Trishten has just been awed that the cd is hers forever and was so thankful, she asked her Nana if she could make me a birthday card (I guess she noticed Kathy getting the stuff together for my birthday.) Anyway, in the card, she told me I was "sweet as pie" and I'll tell you - that made my day!

That's what kind of impact I want to have on the young people I will work with. Not that I am so great - but that they are drawn closer to God and are blessed because of something I did to touch them.

As I said, it was a great day!

Another year gone by

Tomorrow I will turn 31. Woohoo!

I must say, my life as it is today is not what I envisioned it would be when I was 21. My plans were to be a wife and mother, raising kids and working in ministry alongside my husband by this stage of my life. The only part of that dream that resembles my life today is "working in ministry" - but I'm doing that by myself.

I do believe that all of those things will happen in my life, but obviously, I've had the events out of order. I've been wondering for the past week or so what other plans God had (or has) for me that I've missed because I thought my life should go a certain way. It's kind of scary to think about. So I don't dwell on it too long and now I'm working at learning to hear God's voice each day. I've already let 31 years go by without fully giving everything to God, so I don't want to do that anymore and miss what God has planned for me.

The youth ministry plan is coming along, although I didn't get to it tonight like I wanted to. :( Instead, I clipped my dog's hair (you would not believe how much I cut off of her!!), gave her a bath and then cleaned the bathroom! :) Tomorrow night I'll work on it - we're not having church, so I can stay home and work on it - I've got lots of reading to do! I have to have that ready to give to my pastor by next Friday. Good grief how time flies!

Guess I'd better get some sleep - I've got a long day ahead of me tomorrow!

Like a kid in a candy store

Do you know how many resources are out there for youth ministry? Oh my gosh!!! Go online or to the local Christian bookstore, and you can find a book for every aspect of ministry you could think of. The hard part is filtering through everything to get the best of the best. That's rather hard when you're just starting into youth ministry! I don't know where to begin! On top of that, I've got a short deadline to formulate a ministry plan, so there's only so much I can read before that date.

Fortunately, I think I got a hold of some good stuff yesterday. I picked out a couple of books that I think will be very helpful. One of them is a book based on the ever popular "Purpose Driven Life". This book is titled, "Purpose Driven Youth Ministry" by Doug Fields. I liked what I read on the jacket cover and in the forward. I think it will be a great resource to draw upon as I develop our Youth Ministry Plan.

Yikes! I sound grown-up! When did that happen?!?!?! I can't believe they're going to let me be in charge of something!! (My pastor reads my blog - do you think he's getting nervous yet?) :)

Anyway, I'd better hit the books and start formulating that plan. I'm excited and can't wait to see what I come up with!

OUCH!!!

How about this - I pull in the driveway, open the door to my car and start gathering my laptop, purse, etc., to go in the house. Just as I turn in my seat to stand up, I feel this sharp pain in the back of my right leg. I stand there for a second trying to figure out what the heck that could have been when all of a sudden I feel another sharp pain on the front of my leg. A WASP! I drop almost everything and start beating my pants leg to get it out - so that it wouldn't sting me again. It drops to the ground and starts crawling away and I stomp the durn thing. Do you know how long it's been since I was stung by a wasp (much less stung twice)?!?!?!? I was a child the last time that happened. I tell you, I'm not normally a wimp when it comes to pain (at least I don't think so) but those wasp stings hurt (and are still hurting!!!) I almost cried!

Anyway - besides that, it has been a great day. I am so excited about being the youth leader at my church! My mind has been racing since I finally got over the haze of what I have gotten myself into! Now I'm just pumped up. I've got a deadline to formulate a ministry plan and I'm a little freaked about that. I've never built a youth program from the ground up, so this is new territory for me. Fortunately, there are a ton of great resources out there and my pastor emailed me some guidelines for establishing a ministry plan. I'm just really seeking God for His wisdom and leadership. I want this whole thing to be about Him and not me. I'll keep you posted as to what develops!

Life is about to get really interesting

A couple of weeks ago, my pastor shared a thought in his sermon that stuck in my mind. He said that God sometimes doesn't answer our prayers about one particular thing in our lives because He's wanting us to deal with another issue before He moves on that other thing. I knew that applied to me, but I wasn't sure exactly how. I thought there must have been some "hidden sin" in my life that I wasn't confessing, but I couldn't come up with anything. Turns out, it wasn't that at all.

I've always known that God has called me to work in ministry, but I've never been real clear (at least to myself) about what exactly that meant. In my mind, I would meet "Mr. Right" (who is called to ministry, too) and we would enter the "Ministry" together and serve the Lord with all our hearts. Evidently, meeting "Mr. Right" first is not God's plan for me. I never got to the call on my own life because I was waiting for God to bring "Mr. Right" along. That whole idea came from a pure heart - I truly believe that the youth of today need the influence of Godly men in their lives and I wanted to be a part of seeing that happen. I want to be married to a Godly man who loves working with young people - and I do believe that will happen someday - it's just that I have been trying to tell God how it needed to come about and I wasn't listening to Him about what He wants to do in me and through me. I know I don't have to be married to be "complete", I just have always wanted to be married. Still do.

But - for now - I am going to be the Youth Pastor or Leader (or whatever title comes with the job) at my church. That is scary to me!! That means I have a new responsibility - an incredible responsibility - to these young people. And I will answer to God for what I do with what He's giving me.

So, anyway, this answers the question in my mind as to why I've been feeling so empty. I've always known that my own spiritual growth goes through the roof when I am involved in ministry to others - especially young people. I thought I was doing that. I guess I was doing ministry my way and not God's. I'm excited to see what God is going to do with me and the young people at our church. As I said - life is about to get really interesting!

Oh how I love music!

I'm sitting here watching the AFI's 100 Years...100 Songs and I cannot express the feelings I'm experiencing! (I'm amazed at how many of these songs I know!)

I just love what music can do. It has the ability to move one in ways nothing else can. How many times have you been driving down the road and a song comes on that reminds you of a friend, a past love, a dream.....anything? I don't think people realize how much of an impact music has made on our lives. I know for me, when I really want to fellowship with God, I immerse myself in music - either by playing some of my favorite worship cd's or getting by myself on the piano.

Unfortunately, I haven't been having many times of fellowship here lately. Oh, I know there are other ways to go about it, but I can always tell when my spiritual life is getting weak - the music is the first thing to fade away. When that fades, I lose the desire to even be in God's word. I didn't realize how dead I was getting on the inside - I didn't even care about the music.

I'm glad God is able to pierce through to our heart and soul when we allow ourselves to become hardened by the cares of this world. Fortunately, He spoke to my heart this Sunday. I want to sing again, and I am so glad.

The AFI special is closing and what's the number one song? You guessed it - "Somewhere over the Rainbow". One of my personal favorites.

Out of touch...

and I'm not even on vacation!

It's just been a really busy week. But they all seem to be here lately. I need to take some time off and slow things down. The crazy thing is, I don't really know what I spend my time doing! The only major things I've got going on in my life are work, church and family. No love interest, not a ton of friends I'm hanging out with (just my roommates and neighbors from time to time)...I don't know where my time is going!

Truth is, I've been letting a lot of things go in my life and I need to reign them back in. I just haven't had the "want to" to deal with them. *sigh* I'm working on it.

A Real Man

It has been so interesting to hear the different things being said about this man. Regardless of what one might think about Ronald Reagan's politics, no one can deny that he was a charismatic man who impacted people's lives. Even in death, he is able to bring together multitudes of people from different socio-economic, racial, religious and political backgrounds. I can think of no other figure in the history of my 31 years on earth who has been able to do that. What a legacy!

Last night, I watched the ceremony as his casket was loaded onto the caisson and taken to the Rotunda at the Capitol. Earlier in the week, I wrote about how I wasn't able to cry about the death of Ronald Reagan. Well, I made up for it while I watched the procession on C-SPAN. As I sat there, crying my eyes out, I started thinking about what I was crying for. Of course, my heart is breaking for Nancy and the Reagan family and that was a part of my grief. But, I think the biggest reason was the simple fact that a true American Hero has died.

I can't think of anyone else in our country's leadership who possesses the characteristics of this man in the same abundance as he did. (Although, I do feel President Bush does exhibit some of the same qualities as Reagan.) To me, that is sad for our country. At the time Reagan was growing up in this great country, men like him were a dime a dozen. They were everywhere! Now, I do believe there are many people in this country who are great people and do great things in their community, but the truth is if there were more people with a heart and soul like Reagan - which stemmed from a deep faith in God - this country would be a different place. Yes, that's right - I do believe that Reagan's relationship with his Creator influenced every aspect of his life and especially his service to this country. I'm not saying he was perfect, but his deep faith obviously affected his outlook on life. It is simply not possible to have such an optimistic view of life without a secure knowledge of God.

America would do well to study the life of Ronald Reagan and learn from his example. I know I plan to. I have several books on his life and the letters he wrote to people. My goal is to read them within the next few months and try to learn more about this incredible man. He was a great example of a person who knew his core values and was unshakeable in his beliefs, yet - was able to deal with people whose own beliefs conflicted with his and not belittle or demean them.

Thank you, God, for giving us an incredible role model and blessing us with such a leader. May we strive to live up to the standard raised by Ronald Reagan.

What a week!

It has been a busy week! Our Leadership Camp ended on Sunday - it was a wonderful camp (so I've been told!) I didn't actually go to the Leadership Camp because I had to be in the office to get ready for our Power Camp this week!

The Power Camp is a day camp for kids, age 7-12. Each day focuses on an aspect of the theme ("One Mission: Get it! Got it! Give it!" based on John 14:6) and a different sport (golf, football/cheerleading, baseball/softball, basketball, etc.) The kids are having a blast in spite of the incredible heat and humidity. It's so bad, that you sweat through all your clothes in about 10 minutes (or less!) Eeck!

But - it is so fun watching these kids. I am amazed at their energy!! Their daily schedule keeps them more than busy but even at the end of the day, they are still running like it's 8am. It's unbelievable! Needless to say, just being out there for the few hours each day I've been there is wearing me out! I can't even believe I'm still up at 11pm tonight. I'm really tired.

So, I guess I'll go ahead and get into bed.

A REAL American Idol

I don't think enough can ever be said about how great a man Ronald Reagan was - a man of integrity, honesty, intelligence and a true, abiding faith in God. There are far too few leaders, and particularly men, who can be numbered among the ranks of men like Ronald Reagan. I hope that people will take time to learn of him as we mourn his passing. There is much to be learned from his life.

Yesterday, as I was listening to the news media discuss Ronald Reagan, I found myself wanting to cry - but I could not. How could I mourn for the Gipper when he is now in the presence of his Creator? As Ronald Reagan said of the Challenger Space Shuttle crew on the day they lost their lives, he too has "slipped the surly bonds of earth" to "touch the face of God.

I can just hear the conversation as he crossed through the Pearly Gates:

"Welcome to Heaven, Ronnie! We're so glad you're here!"

In that all too familiar "aw shucks" voice he replies, "Well....I'm glad to be here!"

The World has many reasons to be thankful for the life of Ronald Reagan.

Oh, how I wish....

I had a hot tub! I would jump in it when I get home. Yes, that's right, it's 9:35 pm, and I am still at the office.

Our Leadership Camp starts tomorrow morning and I am up here printing all the stuff we need for registration. It has taken 5 hours to print all the stuff I need. Of course, it wouldn't take so long if I wasn't working from our Home Office server (via Citrix), but that's my only option right now.

Needless to say, I am so tired!

Fortunately, all this toil and effort is for a good thing. There will be 150+ kids here and they will be learning how to impact their campus with the Good News of Jesus Christ, through their platform of athletics. I'm sure a few of them will come to know Christ this week and that's always worth any effort put forth.

If you're a pray-er, remember our camp: the campers, staff, speakers and even the staff of the college that is hosting our event.

God bless!

I forgot to mention....

Well, I didn't actually forget, I just didn't want to write about it.

I am no longer in the motorcycle ministry. There are several reasons why, but the most important reason I got out was because I do not have a motorcycle. One day, I really would like to have one, but it won't be soon. So, I didn't feel it was in keeping with a "motorcycle" ministry to be the secretary/treasurer and not have a bike. There weren't any hard feelings on anyone's part - they appreciated my service and understood my position - so I'm glad for that.

However, I sorely miss the fellowship. I really feel like something is missing in my life - and it is, to some extent. I will not be spending time with those people (whom I dearly love) like I once did. Oh sure, we are all still friends, but there is something about spending time with people on a consistent basis that makes life interesting. My life is now a little more dull....it's changed. I thought I was at a place in my life where change wasn't hard to deal with. I've had a lot of change in my life, so I thought I had a grasp on dealing with it - but, alas, I was wrong.

I think that's part of the reason for my funk over the past few weeks. I just didn't want to be around people. But things are getting better. I see God opening a new door in my life: becoming friends with my neighbors. Right now, I'm having to shake off the dust and sharpen my spiritual skills. I've always understood that you learn more about God and grow spiritually when you pour into the lives of others. I had sort of gotten out of that, but, once again - that's changing! God has allowed my path to cross with several people who need a true friend and more importantly, they need Him. I think He's placed me where I am for a reason. Now I'm seeking Him so that I can hear His voice when He speaks and respond with a willing heart. It's a little scary, but I am excited.

That's the other side of change - once you get past the hurt and sadness over what was, you can then look forward to what is and what will be. Time to roll up my sleeves and jump in with both feet!

Dreams and Drama

A couple of weeks ago, I finally found a DVD version of a couple of my favorite movies: "Anne of Green Gables" and "Anne of Green Gables: The Sequel". I absolutely love the books, and the producers of these films have done a fabulous job of bringing the book to film. I first saw these films on PBS when I was about 10 or 12. I then started reading the books - the film was cut into 30 minute segments, so I didn't get to see the "end of the story"! After reading the books, I wanted my life to be like that.

I think what I like best about the story is the innocence and simplicity of life. Oh, how I wish life was really like that. My other favorite part of the story is the romance between Anne and Gilbert. *sigh* What a great love story! Anyway, since Saturday, I've watched both movies (a total of 7+ hours!) There is another movie, "Anne of Green Gables: The Continuing Story", which I don't have yet. I hope to get it soon!

So, last night, I finish watching the second movie and go outside to hang out with my roommate, Meagan, on the porch. Soon Dee Dee comes home and we're all hanging out when a huge disturbance breaks out at our neighbors house. Here is the story at it's most basic level: a girl, her boyfriend and another guy were living in the house next door. Girl and boyfriend break up last week - he comes back this week and first steals the dog, crashes into a fence down the street (tore up his truck!) and nearly runs into someone driving down the road (that all happened on Sunday night); last night he comes back to get more of his stuff (his dad brought him) he trashes the house, and gets into fight with ex-girlfriend and her brother. Well about the time the brawl is taking place on their front lawn, these guys in a car stop to watch and then flag down a cop car that was driving by. The cop turns around and acts like he's going to arrest the ex-boyfriend and girl's brother....but of course, the paperwork would be too much trouble so he lets them go. Evidently, the girl is going to press charges against ex-boyfriend (who happens to be on probation for something else) and he will go to jail anyway.

Needless to say, it was an interesting night and our neighbors are most assuredly interesting! I foresee many entertaining nights in the neighborhood this summer. We're supposed to be having a block party sometime in June. I can't wait! For all of our neighbor's quirks, they really are nice people and we (our neighborhood) are forming a bond that is very cool. Many of them don't know God or care about knowing him...at least for now. :) I hope that the love of Christ will shine through me and touch them.

I truly believe this will be a summer like none I've ever had!

New Look

Thanks to blogger.com for the new capabilities! I decided to take advantage of the new features they are providing and therein lies the reason for the new look. I really like it. Unfortunately, I haven't had time to dive into web design and CSS (cascading style sheets) like I really want to do. I want to be able to design my own site...one day. :)

I hope to have my picture back up again soon. There is a problem with the blogger system (that hasn't been fixed yet, but they are working on it) that won't allow me to link to my picture on the ftp server.

Hope everyone has had a good week so far. My week started out rough, but today something happened that reminded me of just how much God cares for each of us.

As I was driving home this evening, a rain shower - a very heavy rain shower - set in. So, I'm driving along, talking on the phone to my mom when I notice this woman on the side of the road, standing under a flimsy umbrella trying not to get totally soaked by the rain. It wasn't working. I mean, it was pouring rain. Evidently, she was waiting for the city bus. It about broke my heart to see her like that, so the thought went through my head to turn around and offer her a ride home. Mind you, all of this is happening in mere seconds. Now, I'm on a four-lane road, one of the busiest in town, and I thought "there is no way I can get turned around...the traffic is too heavy." Just as the thought is finishing in my head, I look up and there is absolutely no traffic coming. Again...all within seconds. I turn my car around and pull into the parking lot where she was standing. By the time I've gotten to her, there is a man standing there with her too. What else could I do but offer the both of them a ride home? They hurriedly accepted my offer and jumped into the car. Both of them were drenched! I asked them where they lived and tell them I would be glad to take them home. They both lived on the other side of town!!!

As any of you who know me personally will tell, I don't usually meet a stranger. :) I began asking them questions about where they work, their family and if they attended church anywhere. It was a neat conversation. The woman, Cynthia, does attend church and she kept thanking God for his blessings. She's a really neat lady. The guy, Clifton, talked about how he wants to attend church and that he's visited around some, but he hasn't been in church for a while. He has some issues in his life, so I encouraged him to get involved in a good body of believers. We definitely need to be in fellowship with other believers so that we can learn from them and be encouraged in the faith.

Anyway, it was just an awesome experience. All of the things that happened for me to even notice Cynthia standing in the rain could only have happened because of God's hand. Through the whole experience, I was reminded of just how much God knows about each of our lives and how much He cares about what happens to us. Some people might consider this experience to be a coincidence, but I don't believe that for one second. I believe in Divine appointments and this was definitely one of those! How cool is that?

I can't wait to see what God has in store for me next!

Making Changes

As you can see, I've made some changes. To all my friends on my blogroll....I hope to have that back up soon. Just working through some kinks.

Please excuse the mess, but I hope to have it set right before too muich longer!

Breaking through

I always hate when I let this happen. God starts opening doors in various ways, and I sort of shut down. I don't understand myself at times.

It has been a somewhat weird week (or two). I haven't been in God's Word like I should. That is a guaranteed way to start things at a disadvantage. The crazy thing is I know how much I need to be in God's Word right now. There are some new people in my life - neighbors where I live - who desperately need to know Jesus. They are really neat people and I like them a lot, but their lives are empty and they are searching for Someone to fill it (even though they don't know it). I know God has put me where I am for a purpose, and I want to fulfill that purpose. I also know that when God is moving, so is the enemy. Therefore - I need to be prepared. But have I been doing that? Oh no. Not me. I've just been coasting along. I don't know what I'm waiting for.

But...I can see the Light. I know I have to get up and shake the dust off and get busy. People's lives could depend on my preparedness. That is a scary thought. Perhaps that is what put me in neutral. The overwhelming realization that God wants to use me to impact people's lives. I'm only getting what I asked for.

You see, I work for a ministry and most, if not all, of my close friends are Christians. Up until last summer, I had been praying that God would put me in places where I could meet people who need to know Him. Well, He did! He moved me smack in the middle of a bunch of them! Now that He wants to get the ball rolling, I practically shut down. Arrgggh! I get so frustrated with myself!

I'm just so glad God is patient with me. I hope I will reflect His patience when dealing with people who need to experience it for themselves.

Home alone

It would seem that I've come to a place in my life that I don't necessarily like being alone. :) Both of my roommates went home to Illinois for Mother's Day, and I'm bored! You get used to having people around....even if they're not physically present, you still know they'll be coming home sometime that day. I'll be glad when they get home on Monday.

Fortunately, I am not really alone. My family lives close by, and in fact, I spent the night with my sister-in-law and the kids. My niece, Hannah, wanted me to spend the night, so after I finished babysitting for this couple, I packed up and went to my brother's house. (He works night shift, so it was just his wife and the four kids at home.) Anyway, I get there around 10:45 and by 11:15, my two nieces, who stayed up waiting for me, were fast asleep! It was still fun!

I'm excited about tomorrow. I've invited my family over for lunch tomorrow (since I have the house to myself!) We're celebrating Mother's Day. Let me tell you what we did for my mom - it was fun pulling it off!

A couple of years ago, I got my mom a cell phone on my account. At the time I got her an account, I bought a new phone so she just used my old one (that way she didn't have to buy a new phone.) Well, anyway, she's been using that phone ever since and it is old! A few months ago, I got a new phone and gave her my other one. It needed a battery, so she's not been able to use it (those durn batteries are expensive!)

Thursday, my youngest brother came by my office and asked me about her phone - he wanted to get her a battery for Mother's Day. It got me to thinking about what I was going to get my mother as a gift, so I came up with the thought of getting her a brand new phone - and letting all of us pitch in to get it. Since she is on my phone account, I can make changes and do all that stuff, so it was easy to do. I told him to come back after he got through working and we'd go to the store and hook her up. I thought more about it and after checking the balance on her account, decided it might be good to not only get her a new phone, but also pay what she owed for her current bill. Turns out, she's been going over her minutes and her bill has been high the last few months...so not only did we pay her balance, and get her a new phone, I put her on a new plan that would save her money. We were so excited! Of course, before I did all of this, I made the requisite phone calls to the other family members (my brother and his wife and my dad). They were all on board for doing it and so off we went!

The fun part was this...at the time they activated the new phone, her old one would no longer work. I was hoping she wasn't on an important phone call when we switched it over. I called her before we did it to see what she was up to. She was headed home, so I knew she wasn't going to be needing her phone for the next hour or so. We had the sales person activate the phone and then all of us kids (and the grandkids) converged on my parent's house to present her with her gift.

She was totally surprised! I was a bit disappointed that she hadn't tried to use her old phone. She didn't even know it wasn't working!!!! I wanted there to be a little more drama. :)

I love being sneaky when it comes to surprising people. I used to surprise my mom when I was away at college my freshman year. A couple of times, I just showed up at home when she thought I was having to stay at school. That was fun.

I hope all of you will do something special for and with your mom. For those of you whose mothers have passed on - I'm so sorry for your pain, but I hope you can celebrate with a glad heart the time you had with your mother and the impact she had on your life. I've watched my mom deal with her mother's death for the past 22 years, so I know the pain doesn't go away, you just learn to deal with it and remember with great fondness the special times that you shared with her.

Blessings to you all and Happy Mother's Day!

The things we take for granted...

It is amazing how much we take for granted. For instance....eyesight. Now, I thank God for a lot of things, but I believe I'll be adding my eyesight as one of the mentionables.

Today I had an eye exam. My eyes have been bugging me for a while and it had been a year since my last exam, so I went to see the doctor. Turns out the diopter strength of my left eye, which also has an astigmatism, had changed by +2! My right eye just changed by +.75. No wonder I was having trouble seeing!

So, of course, I had to get my eyes dilated to make sure there wasn't something else wrong. When I left the opthalmologist's office, I was having a hard time seeing! Everything was blurry! I was so glad it was a bright, sunshiny day, otherwise I would have never made it back to the office! I don't know why I went back to work....I couldn't see to do anything. I had to squint my eyes and get real close to the monitor to even read email. It was crazy!

On top of that, here it is almost seven hours later, and my vision is still blurred. My eyes make me look like I've smoked pot - they are still quite dilated! I hope everything will be back to "normal" tomorrow.

Unfortunately, the doctor had to order the contact for my left eye, so it won't be here until probably the first of next week. That means the vision in my left eye will be a bit off. I've lived with it for a few weeks, I guess another few days won't matter. That also means that my contacts will now cost me a good deal more. I'll be getting my glasses prescription filled! I guess I'll be wearing them much more frequently. Hey....another accessory for my new look! :)

So I said all that to say this: I miss seeing clearly and promise to not take my sight for granted again! It's a shame you have to lose something (or lose the use of that thing) in order to appreciate the benefits of having it. I'm sure I'd feel the same way if I lost my hearing or sense of touch, etc., etc. It makes me wonder what other things are in my life that I take for granted. I know I assume my friends and family will be around - even though in the back of my mind there's the knowledge that people don't live forever.

I wonder if there are things I take for granted in my relationship with Christ? One thing that comes to mind is His grace. I know I so take that for granted - we all do. I haven't thought too long on it, but perhaps I should. I don't want to take my Savior for granted. As I write this, I'm reminded of images from "The Passion of the Christ." I don't ever want Christ's suffering to be cheapened because I didn't take time to be thankful for what He's done for me.

So as I remember to be thankful for my eyesight, I will try to remember to be thankful for other things I tend to overlook and forget.

Thank God! He's coming home!

Some good news out of Iraq today:

BAGHDAD, Iraq (AP) - American hostage Thomas Hamill, kidnapped three weeks ago in an insurgent attack on his convoy, was found by U.S. forces Sunday south of Tikrit after he apparently escaped from his captors, the U.S. military said. An official said he was in good health.

Hamill, 43, of Macon, Miss., was discovered when he approached a U.S. patrol from the 2nd Battalion 108th Infantry, part of the New York National Guard, in the town of Balad, 35 miles south of Tikrit, a spokesman for U.S. troops in Tikrit said. More...

I'm so glad that this man is going to be coming home. My heart breaks whenever I hear of the men and women who give their lives so that others might experience a taste of what we enjoy here in America, but having someone from your neck of the woods involved in this type of situation makes the whole thing a bit more real. I do not know this man or his family, but have been praying that he would come home alive.

Continue to pray for the safety of our men and women serving in the armed forces. They are truly special people and deserve the utmost honor and respect. God bless them!

I survived!

It has been an interesting few weeks leading up to our banquet, and now I'm glad we're through it! I was exhausted on Friday! So exhausted, that I came home and went to sleep at 6:30 pm Friday evening and only woke up once at 1 am when my dog started barking because my roommate had come home from babysitting. I needed the sleep since I had to be at my babysitting job on Saturday morning at 7:30 am. I'm still tired, though, and will probably retire early tonight. :)

The banquet was fantastic! We had almost 800 people in attendance and I personally escorted our Governor and his Chief of Staff to their seats. Gov. Haley Barbour is really nice and I was so excited to have the privilege of escorting him. How cool is that? I wanted to work on his campaign last year when he was running for office, but I never was able to work that out. I really hate that I didn't make a greater effort to be involved. I hope to get more involved in local politics, since we have a mayoral race coming up soon. We desperately need some change!

Anyway, back to my original topic - God really blessed our banquet and hopefully allowed us to raise enough money to fund our budget a little more comfortably this year. One thing that is easy for people to forget is that doing "ministry" does cost - and we are so grateful for those people who support us as we try to impact the lives of athletes, coaches and all whom they influence. I am truly blessed to be a part of the ministry of the Fellowship of Christian Athletes.

Now, we have to go through the process of closing out the event and getting things ready for next year's event. We will sure be busy and then it's time to get ready for Camp!!! Never a dull moment in FCA, that's for sure!

Well, I guess I'll close for now. I might just go ahead and take a nap. I need to clean my part of the house (the living room & dining room) but I just don't want to. :) I'll just wait and do it tomorrow - after all....tomorrow is another day!