Wednesday, October 29, 2003

Adding some new stuff

As you may be able to tell, I've added some stuff to my page. (Look to the right!) I've wanted to put some info about me on my website and just haven't had a chance to do it. I've also added a link where you can IM me directly from my website. (You need to have AIM installed on your computer for it to work.)

Anyway, let me know what you think! If there's something else you'd like to know about me, leave a comment. I might do one of those "100 things about me" lists. :-)

Monday, October 27, 2003

What a great weekend!

I had such a wonderful weekend. There wasn't anything exceptionally great about the weekend other than the fact that I really could sense God's presence in a way I haven't felt in a while.

One new thing I did was volunteer to serve at the local theatre. I worked the concession stand serving snacks and drinks. I had fun, got to meet some really nice people, see a good play and to top it all off - was groped by a 70 year old man! That was definitely a first for me! I don't know if he realized he touched my butt, but touch it he did! Needless to say, I was shocked, but not really offended. I mean, the man had been drinking and just seemed to be excited about being there. (He was also a volunteer.)

Anyway, back to the original point of this post. I have really been on the "mountaintop" in my walk over the past few days. I have come to appreciate these times. It gives me an opportunity to look back at where I've come from and examine all the things God has brought me through and has been trying to teach me. He has blessed me in so many ways, I could talk about it for days.

One thing I've learned I need to do while on the "mountaintop" is gear up for the next valley. Because...they always come. The good thing is (at least for this moment) I don't fear the next valley experience as much as I used to. I believe I'm learning to trust God more (I've been working hard at it), and so when those dark times come, I'm going to trust God. I know the valley does not last forever. I'll come through it, because I have before.....because He's brought me through before. Of course, I am speaking from the "mountaintop" right now!

I don't mean to sound like I've got it all together, because at this point in my life, I've just begun to realize how un-together I am - but I do sense a change in me. I'm still working through that Bible study "A Call to Die", and the other day, I was reading about going through dark times. As a young Christian, dark times can be brought about by the sin that is in our life. However, as we mature in our faith, there are dark times we experience because God is wanting to test us - to see where we are in our faith. As I read this particular day's devotion, I really began to examine where I've been in my walk and what were the lessons learned from the dark times I've already experienced. I believe most of them so far have been because of sin in my life, which is kinda scary! That means I haven't been through a time of "testing". You know - the kind that results in those really dark times. I know it's coming and I'm trying to prepare. I think I'm more scared of failing the test than actually going through it.

What if I am found lacking in some way? What character flaw in me will be revealed? What will become of me? What will people see when I go through the test - God or me?

As I read these questions, I realize just how self-centered they sound. Part of me doesn't want to be shown in a bad light or come up short - as most people would agree (if they're honest!) But - there is another part that doesn't want to bring shame upon God's name. I want to be an example to others that, "yes, you too can make it and be full of joy and peace!"

I've tried not to dwell too much on the fact that valleys and dark times of testing are inevitable. I'm just trying to prepare - filling myself with the Word and listening to God's voice. I want to be able to hear Him when He's speaking in that "still small voice" and for those times I can't hear Him, I'll know His voice anyway because of His Word that is in my heart. I just want Him to be proud of me!

Thursday, October 23, 2003

Finger Update!

Well, good news - I'm almost back 100%!!!! Almost!

My finger is/was broken, but not like one would think. I went to an orthopedic doctor on Tuesday and had him check it out. He told me that when my finger bent backwards (when I hit the floor!) the ligament in my finger had a good hold on the bone and basically pulled a small chip of the bone off. Ehhh! So it wasn't like the bone was broken in half or anything. THANK GOD!!!! I don't think I would have been able to handle a seriously broken finger!

I don't think my church would have liked it too much either, since I'm the pianist! It would have been terrible to sing to taped music.

Anyway, I am using all 10 fingers to type this post. My "broken" finger is still very stiff and sore (from the tissue damage more than the bone chip) and is colored a lovely mix of purples, greens and yellows. Fortunately, the bruising is fading away. I'll be glad when I can bend my finger and not notice!

Monday, October 20, 2003

Shout outs

I just wanted to post a quick thanks to all of those who visit my site on a regular basis or who have my site listed in your links. I appreciate you!

Here are a few new links I've added to my website that I think are interesting.

Jax of Jax Place

Ailina of Paperbent and Lordside

Neely of Unquenchable Songs & Endless Praise

And last, but not least:

Joshua of VoxJoshua

Check them out if you get a chance!

Sunday, October 19, 2003

Another first

I must say, I do not like getting older! Up until last April, I had never broken a bone in my life, and now within a year and a half, I have broken two!

Today, I broke my finger. And not just any finger. No - due to my injury, I am sure to offend someone because of the stigma attached to a fully extended middle finger. I cannot help it.

"So, Christy, how did you break the aforementioned finger?" I'm sure you're all dying to know. Well, that's what makes this story even better! I told the lady at the ER business office that when I injure myself, I make sure there's an interesting story to go with it, otherwise, what's the point, right?

Anyway, here's what happened: Deedee cooked a fabulous lunch - steak, grilled vegetables and mashed potatoes. (Her boyfriend helped her with the grilling.) Anyway, we were sitting in the living room, eating lunch. Deedee's boyfriend was sitting on the floor. Everyone was tossing my dog the fat and gristle from their steaks, so she was walking the floor, waiting to see what else was coming. Well, James looks away to say something to Deedee, and Sheba walks up and grabs his steak off of his plate. I couldn't believe it! So I scream at Sheba and walk over to her to grab the steak from her. At the same time, I go to pop her on the head, and she moves! So instead of popping Sheba, my hand makes contact with the hardwood floor. After that, I didn't care about the steak, Sheba or anything else. That hurt!!!!! After about an hour, and my finger doubling in size, I decided to go get it checked out.

The good news is, I was in and out of the ER in an hour and a half. The bad news, of course, was that I had fractured my finger. The doc told me I had chipped the bone. Tomorrow, I'm going to try and see an orthopedic doctor to make sure there's not any worse damage. After all, I work on a computer every day and play piano for church. My fingers are precious to me!

So that's the drama of my day. As I sit here working on this entry, I'm getting better at typing. I think I'll make do at work. We'll see how I fare at the piano next Sunday!

Friday, October 17, 2003

Everything I ever needed to know about life, I learned from my dog.

Last night, I was reminded of a valuable lesson - trust.

I gave my dog, Sheba, a bath. She hates getting a bath. Even though she always needs them by the time I give her one, she simply hates getting one. When the bath is over, I have to wrap her in a towel and hold her tightly to dry her off. Otherwise, she makes a mess. She'll run all over the place, spraying water and hair over everything and then will make a running dive into the nearest carpet to begin the "Doggie Shuffle". Anyone with a dog is sure to know what that is!

Anyway, we made it through the bath and because she was so good, I decided to give her a treat. So as I got the treat and was sitting on the bed, about to give it to her, I was reminded of how I respond to my Master when He has to "give me a bath" or when He wants to pour out His blessings in my life.

As I sat there, breaking up the cookie into small pieces, I watched my dog and how she responded to me. She sat there, totally focused on my hands and what was in them. As I gave her each piece, her eyes never left my hands. A couple of times I closed my hand with a piece of the cookie inside it, and just sat there, waiting to see what she would do. There were a couple of times she looked away - a car was passing by or a noise caught her attention - but she would always quickly turn back to stare intently at my hand, waiting to see what I was going to do.

It seemed like God was gently prodding me about my response to Him. How do I respond to Him when he wants to "wash me clean"? Do I just endure it, counting down the time until I can get out and run free? Or do I relish those times of cleansing and allow Him to do a thorough job? Am I as fervent in my devotion to "watching His hand"? Do I allow the distractions of this world to cause me to turn away from Him and perhaps miss a blessing or a ministry opportunity He has for me? Do I trust Him enough to simply wait for Him to move in my life? I was convicted, to say the least.

This is something I've been dealing with for a while. This, trusting God thing. I'm trying to figure out why it is so hard for me. It's sort of unfair, because He made me to be independent, but I'm supposed to lay that all down (dying daily to that sinful nature in me) and submit to Him. I'm not complaining, just trying to figure out how to do that. I'm sure a lot of my struggle is due to the sin of pride in my life. I've just recently recognized that I do have too much pride. It's hard when God gives you a good "scrubbing" by shining the light of His truth in your life.

The fact remains that I do want to trust God. To be broken and submissive to Him. Good grief, if I can't trust the Creator of the Universe, then whom can I trust? The hard part is getting to that broken and submissive place. To be the clay in the Potter's hands. To realize, truly realize, that without God, there is no point in going on.

I'm getting better - of this I'm sure! I'm almost beginning to look forward to the next bath!

Thursday, October 16, 2003

Yes, Grasshoppa! A Ninja Story

Found this hilarious story over at Dave's site.

I almost wet myself laughing at it!

What kind of world do we live in?

I'm sure all of you have heard the name Terri Schindler-Schiavo in the news lately. Just today, after hearing her father on the Sean Hannity radio program, I went and looked up the website her family has about Terri's situation.

This is just unbelievable! The videos on this website of Terri and her reactions to several different stimuli is amazing. Her husband (who I believe is just evil) has refused any type of rehabilitative therapy for Terri ever since she received an award for a malpractice suit. Terri's father asserts that her husband had something to do with her "collapse" and that is why he doesn't want her to live. He must be afraid of what she would say if she were to start talking.

I only wish I had known more about this before now. Folks, pray for Terri and her family, and that God would intervene in this situation. Unless something happens (i.e., Governor Jeb Bush intervenes or God miraculously intervenes) Terri will slowly die of starvation.

There are several links on Terri's webpage for ways you can help. Who knows, a few more phone calls might make a difference.

Wednesday, October 15, 2003

Made some changes

Just so you know, I had to change my commenting feature, which means I've lost all the awesome comments left prior to today.

I'm sorry about that! I just got tired of my comments not being there from time to time. I've seen Haloscan being used by several other blogs and thought I'd give them a try.

Please feel free to go back and comment on any prior posting! It might be fun to see what people have to say about past posts!

In any case, I always enjoy reading your posts! I hope you'll continue to leave a bunch!

If only...

Have you ever been somewhere, and a person of the opposite sex walks into the room and so captivates your attention that you lose yourself for a moment (or two, or three....)? That happened to me today.

I was at my friend's office (I was just dropping something off to her) and this guy walks in for a meeting with someone else in her office. Well, when he walked in, I was just knocked over - so to speak. He is an attractive man and the first thing I thought was, "Lord, please let him be single!" Of course, the first thing I look for is a ring on that fourth finger of his left hand and lo and behold, it is naked! I'm thinking, this is good. Well, introductions were made and he asks me if I attended a particular college. I knew he looked vaguely familiar, so when he said he had also attended that school, that explained it. So he goes into the other office and then a few seconds later comes back out. When I introduced myself to him, I mentioned that I work for the Fellowship of Christian Athletes. He had come back out to ask me how he could get involved with FCA, so I told him I could get him some more information about it. He said ok and went back into the other office for his meeting.

Meanwhile, I'm standing there, praying to God that he is single. I mean, I've never been this rattled by meeting someone. It is very strange. Anyway, my friend gives me a piece of paper so I can write my name and office number down to give to this guy, so he can call me to get more info about FCA. When I finished, I jokingly said, "I'm leaving now, so when you give this to him, ask him if he's married. If he's not, tell him to call me!!!" We laughed at that (although I was dead serious) and then she proceeded to show me something on her computer.

All the while I'm standing at her desk, I'm thinking I need to get out of there before I do or say something stupid. Before too much longer, his meeting is over, so he comes back out and stands there and talks to the both of us for a minute. He then asks me where I went to high school. It turns out, not only did we go to the same college, but we had both attended the same high school. He graduated the year before I did. This explained further why he was familiar to me.

We were having a great conversation (I can tell he is a genuinely nice guy and committed to Christ). I couldn't remember much about him from high school (although, the more I think about it, I'm beginning to remember some things. i.e., he was a really nice guy in high school, too!) The good news is - he's a Christian! He shared a little bit about what God had done in his life and that was cool. The bad news is - he is separated from his wife (has been for a year) and has a four year old daughter. I was so disappointed!!!! I won't lie about it. He wants to reconcile with his wife, which is great! That is God's will, I know. At the same time, he said he is just trusting the Lord for his life and if it was God's will for someone else to come into his life, he was ok with that.

I'll say it again - I was disappointed. Here lately, I've really been thinking about dating and relationships and have begun to pray regularly for my future husband (whoever he might be), so the whole idea of meeting someone has been on my mind. I was rather startled at the intense reaction I had to this guy - it wasn't just a physical response like "oh my goodness, he's hot!" There was also a strong desire to want to know more about him. I don't think I've ever experienced that before. It got worse the more we talked, because he really has a great personality and I could tell he would be the type of guy I would definitely date.

So I left my friend's office (after he left) and start talking to God. Of course the most obvious argument I present to Him is "Why couldn't he have met me before his wife?" I immediately know the answer to that - God gently reminds me: "Do you remember who you were 7 years ago and what you've learned since then?"

"I know!" Then I proceed to throw a short pity party just a bit before I really get a hold of myself and begin to thank God that He knows what's best for me. I finally give it up and tell Him that I trust Him for bringing the right person into my life at the right time. I know He will. I just get impatient.

Nevertheless, this whole episode has caused me to consider what I would do if I met someone who was divorced and had a child. I don't think I would have as much a problem with dating a man who had been married and had no children with his first wife, especially if the guy was a dedicated Christian and had done everything in his power to try and reconcile. But to consider someone who was married and had a child....I just don't know. This guy would make me wonder about it (if he were available and were interested in me, that is!)

To any of you reading this who are divorced or are in a situation similar to this, please don't think this is a judgment on you or your life. I'm just writing about my feelings and experiences. I know that there are certain things I don't want, and until God changes my mind, that's the way I feel. Being involved with someone who is divorced with children is one of those things I don't think I could do. But - I'm not sure.

I'm just glad that God is in control. I truly trust Him for this area of my life and can't wait to see what He brings about. I'm just keeping my eyes and ears open, so that when He directs, I will follow!

Tuesday, October 14, 2003

A beautiful day!

I just love it when God blesses us with beautiful weather! Fall has finally and officially arrived!!!! Woo hoo!! I saw it when it came. It was the coolest thing!

I was driving to my house after going by the bank and could actually see fall arrive. Let me explain: this morning when I woke up, the sky was overcast and it was muggy outside. Not really hot, but just yucky. Well, when the front was moving through, you could actually see where the clouds ended and the blue skies began! It was cool! By the time I got to my house, there was a wind out of the north, blowing through the trees and you could just feel fall arriving! It was fantastic! I was so excited and the rest of my day was just great! This is my absolute favorite time of year!

In other news....I am really enjoying this Bible study - "A Call To Die". Well, enjoying may not be the right word....but it will do. I know one thing - I am learning a lot about myself. (I think I said that in another post.) It has been very revealing - and not always easy. I believe that God is about to do something in my life, or allow something big to take place. I only wish He would give me a "heads up" about it. Well, I guess He is - I know that I am supposed to be preparing for whatever it is by spending time in the word. I need to take some time to just "listen". I'm not real good at that.

Anyway - my battery is about to die and I'm getting cold sitting here at Cups, so I guess I'll go for now. I'm going to go home and open some windows! :)

Thursday, October 09, 2003

One other thing...

To all my fellow bloggers whose sites I used to visit on a regular basis (and you know who you are).....

I have not forgotten about you! I miss you terribly and feel so out of touch since I haven't been able to read your sites and post comments to your pages.

Don't forget about me or give up on me! I'll be back in full force in a couple of weeks! (Lord, willing!)

Watch out blogosphere, here I come!

Found some time

Here I am again at a local coffee shop, Cups, so that I can post to my website. I am tired of not having internet at my house, but it will be a couple of weeks before it gets hooked back up. Waiting for the next payday.

Finally got most of my money from Meagan's paycheck fiasco. I hope to get the rest of it by tomorrow. It's not a moment too soon, since my car insurance will expire on Monday if I don't get a check to them. (That's another result of the money problems caused by Meagan's paycheck bouncing.) Anyway, it is about to be resolved and God has still been faithful through it all. I am glad I know Him.

Speaking of God....this Bible study Deedee and I are doing is kicking my tail. I've come to realize it is a good thing...but VERY difficult! In my previous post, I mentioned that God is dealing with me on some issues in my life. It has been difficult to come face to face with these issues. The one thing I am more certain of than ever, is that I need a Savior. I thought I "had it together" on a lot of different things. That was one of my main problems. I had become comfortable with me the way I am, but what I am is still way short of Christ's standard. Darn. I'm just thankful for my Savior and for the grace and mercy that was provided to me by His sacrifice.

A scripture I've had to memorize for this study is Galatians 2:20 - "I no longer live, but Christ now lives in me. So I will live my life in this earthly body by trusting in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me." I've read that scripture before (as I'm sure most people have) but it definitely has more meaning now. I am awed and amazed at the price Jesus paid for me. The least I can do is to trust Him. (Another one of my incredible shortcomings!) It isn't easy, but I'm getting better at trusting Him.

Thursday, October 02, 2003

Checkin' In

I got an opportunity to be online, so I thought I'd post something really quick.

Deedee and I have started the study "A Call to Die". It is really bringing out some things in my life that I've never dealt with before. As hard as it is, I'm glad to be doing it. I've gotten tired of my spiritual life as it is and so it is worth whatever cost to be able to know Christ better and be more real with myself.

My pastor pointed something out at church last night that I had never considered or realized. He said that the Bible is a mirror that shows us our shortcomings and failures - our imperfections. For example, I may have never known what envy is until one day, I read about it in the Bible. All of a sudden, I realize - I have been envious of my friend. Now I know of a shortcoming in my life. The good news is, we have hope in Christ! There is redemption! Thank God for Grace!

Anyway, what I realized is this: I had been reading the Bible looking for a "good feeling" so to speak and not for the the hard truth. Not for the Word that cuts like a two-edged sword. I have been avoiding those parts that point out my shortcomings. Those parts that would really cause me to examine my life and that would eventually make me more like Christ.

Needless to say, it hasn't been "fun" exactly. I've been looking hard and long at my life. I'm not sure what I think right now, but I know that God is working something out in me and I can't wait to see what He can make out of this mess I am. :)