One new thing I did was volunteer to serve at the local theatre. I worked the concession stand serving snacks and drinks. I had fun, got to meet some really nice people, see a good play and to top it all off - was groped by a 70 year old man! That was definitely a first for me! I don't know if he realized he touched my butt, but touch it he did! Needless to say, I was shocked, but not really offended. I mean, the man had been drinking and just seemed to be excited about being there. (He was also a volunteer.)
Anyway, back to the original point of this post. I have really been on the "mountaintop" in my walk over the past few days. I have come to appreciate these times. It gives me an opportunity to look back at where I've come from and examine all the things God has brought me through and has been trying to teach me. He has blessed me in so many ways, I could talk about it for days.
One thing I've learned I need to do while on the "mountaintop" is gear up for the next valley. Because...they always come. The good thing is (at least for this moment) I don't fear the next valley experience as much as I used to. I believe I'm learning to trust God more (I've been working hard at it), and so when those dark times come, I'm going to trust God. I know the valley does not last forever. I'll come through it, because I have before.....because He's brought me through before. Of course, I am speaking from the "mountaintop" right now!
I don't mean to sound like I've got it all together, because at this point in my life, I've just begun to realize how un-together I am - but I do sense a change in me. I'm still working through that Bible study "A Call to Die", and the other day, I was reading about going through dark times. As a young Christian, dark times can be brought about by the sin that is in our life. However, as we mature in our faith, there are dark times we experience because God is wanting to test us - to see where we are in our faith. As I read this particular day's devotion, I really began to examine where I've been in my walk and what were the lessons learned from the dark times I've already experienced. I believe most of them so far have been because of sin in my life, which is kinda scary! That means I haven't been through a time of "testing". You know - the kind that results in those really dark times. I know it's coming and I'm trying to prepare. I think I'm more scared of failing the test than actually going through it.
What if I am found lacking in some way? What character flaw in me will be revealed? What will become of me? What will people see when I go through the test - God or me?
As I read these questions, I realize just how self-centered they sound. Part of me doesn't want to be shown in a bad light or come up short - as most people would agree (if they're honest!) But - there is another part that doesn't want to bring shame upon God's name. I want to be an example to others that, "yes, you too can make it and be full of joy and peace!"
I've tried not to dwell too much on the fact that valleys and dark times of testing are inevitable. I'm just trying to prepare - filling myself with the Word and listening to God's voice. I want to be able to hear Him when He's speaking in that "still small voice" and for those times I can't hear Him, I'll know His voice anyway because of His Word that is in my heart. I just want Him to be proud of me!
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