Reality check

I was minding my own business, on my way to Office Max to get some stuff for our board meeting tonight, when all of a sudden, I had this thought...."you really are a weenie."

Yeah, that's right, I'm a weenie.

I was talking with someone the other day who is considering working on a cruise ship for a couple of months during the summer. My first reaction to that was "how cool!" And then I thought, "but man, I sure would miss my family, friends and church!" So today as I was driving along, I was thinking about my friend's opportunity and wishing I didn't have student loans to pay off so I could do it too. And then, I thought "if I was away from all that is familiar, would I be as strong of a Christian as I or my friends think I am?" The answer to that is "I don't know." I don't know that I could withstand all the temptations that are out there "in the world." Let's face it, I still live a somewhat sheltered life. All of my close friends and family are believers, I work for a Christian organization and most nights, I stay at home.

I'm going to go out on a limb here and be real honest: I don't know that I have enough discipline in my spiritual life to carry me out into the "real world." I don't get into the Word enough - although I'm trying to rectify that. I don't spend a lot of time really talking to God - or more importantly, listening to God. I've been coasting along on "reserve". You know - all the Bible knowledge I have at this moment (which is probably only the tip of the Bible-knowledge iceberg), the strength I gain from my friends and the work I do. I mean, it has only been in the last few years that I've begun to really understand the difference between knowing God and having a relationship with Him.

As I was facing the reality of my own spirituality, I wondered if, perhaps, God has wanted to use me for something but didn't open the opportunity because He knew I wasn't strong enough or disciplined enough to handle it. That was a sobering thought.

I can't spend time worrying about all the "what if's" now. I just know I've got to put Christ front and center in my life. Oh, don't get me wrong, He has been the majority of my "life", but I'm beginning to examine whether or not He has been my Life. I want that to change. It's so much easier to just go along with things as they've always been, but it's time for a change.

My pastor made the comment the other day that we've become too formal in our services. Maybe a better way to explain it is distant. I've become too distant in my own walk, satisfied to maintain the status quo. I'm sure that has contributed to the type of services we've had a church. I want to be free.....free to do whatever God asks of me.

I'm not sure how to change me, except that I need to get into God's Word and let His Word get into me. It has the power to change and so that is where I will begin. I know God has been telling me to dig into His Word. I don't understand why I've had such a hard time "doing" just that, but I have. I know that some incredible things are in store for me....but I won't see them happen (whatever they are) until I do this part first.

"Lord, I need your help to overcome myself. I've been my own worst enemy when it comes to knowing You more. Keep shining the Light of your Truth in my life and help me to face those dark corners only you know about so that I may live in true abandon, unfettered by the fear caused by those dark places, to worship You."

Amen.

Part-time job

Ok, I said I'd update you about the part-time job at Old Navy. Well, here's what I know....last week I went for a job interview - which went very well. The guy who interviewed me was very friendly and helped me to feel right at ease. If you can believe this, he was impressed that I was not only on time for the interview, but I was early by about 10 minutes. What is the world coming to that employers would be impressed that potential employees can be on time. If that's the only requirement for this job, I know I got it!

Anyway, I'll be going back for another interview probably next week. The general manager is on vacation and will be back then. I think I would enjoy working this part-time job. The manger who interviewed me seemed to be willing to work me a bunch, so if I do get the job, I may not have much spare time. *sigh* Oh well, the more I work, the faster I can pay off some bills! I'm trying not to let the short-term struggles obstruct my view of the long-term victories.

We'll see. I'll be sure to let you know what happens!

God is awesome

I just wanted to share that this morning. :)

I'm so awed by His grace, mercy and love. Everything around me tells of His wonderous works and I know that He is with me. I'm so thankful that even when things seem to be a bit off - He is still in control. I read something this morning that was really encouraging. It said:

Don't tell God how big your storm is,
tell the storm how big your God is!

As I said, God is awesome!

He knows

So here it is, 4:17 am on Saturday morning, and I have been up since 6:40 am, Friday morning. It has been a very long day, and God has been a part of every minute.

As I've mentioned before, I work for a sports ministry. Our annual College Getaway started on Friday, so I had to go to the office, finish a few things and hit the road by noon. Of course, it didn't work out that way. I actually got on the road around 1:40. I was supposed to be at the campground (which is an hour and a half away) by 2 pm. Needless to say, I was late getting there.

My responsibility at this event was registration and housing - I organize registration and make sure everyone has a place to sleep. We were planning for 270 people to attend (including coaches and staff) but housing for the girls was really tight. So tight, that I knew there was a possibility that I might have to drive back home because there wouldn't be a place for me to sleep. We finish registration, eat dinner and then begins the process of balancing the money and checking to make sure housing is ok (while everyone else is participating in the service and activities that follow). I should have started with ironing out problems with the housing, but I dealt with the money first - that way, if there were any problems, I could still get with the coach or student leader from the school to work things out. This process always takes time - mostly because I have an accountant's personality.....details, details, details. For some reason, I don't feel like I've done a good job unless I know exactly which check or cash came with each person. And if I don't keep good records as we go through registration (because it gets busy)...it can mean a long time to reconcile.

So anyway, I'm working on getting the money straight (which it was, thank God!) and finally finish around 11:15pm...about the time that all the evening's activities are finishing up and people are getting ready for bed. All of a sudden, my worst expectations came true....we had a situation. There were more girls than beds! I thought we had worked everything out ok, but because of a mis-count of beds in one cabin, they were a bed short. On top of that, there were three beds without mattresses in this same cabin, which meant they were four beds short and nowhere else to go. So the room I was planning on staying in (which had space for four people) went to the overflow of girls.

Well, I'll tell ya - right up until this problem arose, I was extremely tired and was looking forward to going to bed. However, my adrenaline kicked in (not to mention some serious frustration), because I had a problem to fix, and the only way to fix it was to let them have my room and me drive home. An hour and a half drive. Mind you, by the time we resolved things and I got packed up, it was 12:45.

After stopping at a hotel for a bathroom break and a cup of coffee, I take off. Fortunately, I have a friend who was still up, so I called and talked to him for a while. He talked me through half of my trip home. Then I picked up a talk show about ghosts and hauntings and that kept my attention until I got within 20 miles of home. I was home free! Even better than that - I was going to be in bed by 3 am!

Or so I thought.

Something came up, of which I'm not at liberty to write about, and I knew then, that in the midst of all the turmoil and angst I had dealt with at camp, God had a reason for me leaving early.

You see, right before I left the campground, I decided to double check the boys housing. Turns out, there were two whole cabins that were empty, but because it was so late and everyone had just about settled in, we couldn't do anything about it. The thought had crossed my mind to double check the boys roster, but I didn't do it. God knew I needed to come home.

That's only happened to me a couple of other times, but each time God has moved in that way, I have been totally amazed, humbled and for a short while....scared. What if I had listened to myself, checked the boys roster and worked things out so I could stay at the camp? I would not have been in the right place at the right time to be where God wanted me to be. Only God knows the bad things that might have happened if I hadn't come home.

There are still things to be dealt with, but I believe God will use this incident to work in people's lives. I am eager to see what else He else has planned! No matter what anyone says, being a Christian is not boring!

Now I'm about to go to bed. I'm so exhausted, I'll probably sleep the whole day away. I haven't forgotten I promised to post about the part-time job. I'll try to write about that later today.

Good night! (Or Good morning!)

Getting nervous

I feel silly. My interview for a part-time job is this afternoon and I am getting nervous. What's that all about? Perhaps it's because deep down I wonder, "What if they don't like me?" or even "What if they like me and I get the job!?!?!?" It's crazy.....I admit it.

Of course, it all boils down to this one thing: change. As I've written before, change is the one thing we can count on in our lives. Even though I've dealt with a lot of changes in my life, I'm always amazed at how some changes are harder to deal with. I guess it's because some changes represent a failure or a goal that hasn't been achieved. I don't like those kinds of changes.

The fact that I need a part-time job is a result of a failure to manage my finances better. And I don't like that. You see, if I get this job, I know there will be people I know who will see me and think, "Gosh, I can't believe Christy is working two jobs! That's a shame." Of course, they probably won't think that, but even if they did - so what? Right? I don't usually do things or base my life around what others may think, but I can't help but think about it anyway.

The other thing I ponder is what if this isn't what God wants me to do? Will I hear his voice or am I trying to "fix" things again?

*sigh*

I guess I'll just go and see what happens. More later on....

Life could get interesting

So, back at the end of December, I go shopping at Old Navy. While I'm there, I casually ask one of the sales people if they are hiring. She didn't know, but directed me to one of the managers, who gave me an application and spent a few minutes talking with me. He told me they would be hiring the first of February.

Anyway, I get the phone call tonight to come for an interview. I'm rather nervous - ain't that crazy? I can do whatever I set my mind to - of that I'm sure - and I worked retail for nearly 5 years.....so I'm not sure why I'm nervous. Perhaps it's just because it represents a possible change in my life.

In case you were wondering why I am looking for a part-time job, I've just got some debt I need to eliminate. I've really been convicted about being a good steward of my finances. It has never really been a priority, and I know I've disappointed God on more than one occasion. :) It is an area in my life that needs work, so I'm working on it!

I think I've sub-consciously been waiting for God to swoop down and erase my financial problems, all along knowing that I should be doing more to help myself get out of the mess I created. Now, I'm not saying that God can't "open up the floodgates" and take care of it all...but I don't think He's going to...at least not at the moment. Maybe He will bring along "Joe Millionaire" who will pay off all my debts (don't worry, I'm not holding my breath!), but for now, I must do all I can to please my Lord. Who knows how He will bless me! :)

One positive about getting a part-time job (besides being able to pay off some debts!) is that I will be around people who may not know Christ. What a ministry opportunity!!! Do you know how hard it is to share the Gospel when everyone you work with and know is already a Christian? That's one reason I was so excited when we moved into this house. There are two coffee shops within a mile of our house, and I've been able to meet new people who need Jesus. It has been a really cool thing.

So, we will see how this all pans out. It could make for some interesting posts...although I hope not fewer ones!!!!

Shaping up to be a busy week

There is so much to do this next week, I don't know if I'll ever get it all done! The ministry I work for is having a college getaway this weekend, so we will be preparing for that - which means I've got a lot of paperwork to get done. In addition to that, it's the end of the month, so I've got to get our financial report done to send in to our home office. That's just what I have to do at work.

My room is still a mess....although it is a bit more organized. It's not that I haven't wanted to attack the room and get it clean.....I simply ran out of time! Of course, there were some times I could have put to better use, but hey....who doesn't goof off every now and then! Besides that, I haven't felt well for the last couple of weeks. I'm not sure what it is. I've been exercising regularly, but I think I need to do better with what I'm eating. I haven't been eating like I should - eating way too many carbs. I know some people think that's crazy....but I guess I'm one of those folks that need to watch carbs. When I cut back on them, I feel ten times better and have more energy....not to mention I lose weight like crazy! Time to get back into the groove of healthy eating. I probably should get my "sleep time" back on schedule. I'm going to have to start going to bed at 10pm. :)

Anyway....today was fabulous! We had a great time in church and then had the pastor and his family over for lunch. His uncle was our guest preacher today and he also came over. Deedee (one of my roommates) and I love to have company over. We're both very "people" oriented and love being with friends and/or family.

Well, it's past my bedtime already, so I'll close for now.

p.s. I can't wait for our Super Bowl party on Sunday!!!! We're going to have a blast!!!

Another legend, lost...

Today, another icon of Children's Television died. Bob Keesan, aka Captain Kangaroo, passed away at the age of 76.

"Unlike many other children's programs, Captain Kangaroo was not filmed before a studio audience and did not include children in its cast," says the Museum of Broadcasting on its Web site. "Keeshan wanted nothing that would come between him and the children in his television audience and so spoke directly to the camera. He also personally supervised which commercials could air on the program, and promoted products, such as Play-Dough and Etch-a-Sketch, which he saw as facilitating creative play, while avoiding those he felt purely exploitative."...

He was critical of today's TV programs for children, saying they were too full of violence. And he spoke wherever he went about the importance of good parenting.

"Parents are the ultimate role models for children," he said. "Every word, movement and action has an effect. No other person or outside force has a greater influence on a child than the parent." - CBSNews.com

I fondly remember watching Captain Kangaroo as a child. It's a shame that there aren't people, like Captain Kangaroo and Mr. Rogers, who are involved in providing good quality television for children. Have you watched children's tv lately? Oh my gosh! If I had kids, they would not be watching Nickelodeon or PBS (or much of any other station for that matter!) - one channel is notorious for "Adult" cartoons that are targeted at kids and the other simply provides leftist, liberal propoganda veiled in "educational programming". It's ridiculous. Long gone are the days of "Captain Kangaroo", "Mr. Rogers" and "The Electric Company". I miss those days! :-(

We are so blessed

Last night, after I got home from church, I was reading through some of the Iraqi blogs I recently added to my blogroll. Here in America, we are truly blessed.

We often take for granted that our electricity works, the sewers aren't overflowing, we don't have to listen to bombs, mortars and gunfire (at least in most parts of the US!) on a daily basis, and most importantly, we do not have to learn how to "handle" Freedom. For the Iraqi people, this is every day living. I think it is hard for us to understand the turmoil they are dealing with. Of course, it is a welcome "turmoil". Those people whose lives are vastly improved with the downfall of Saddam are extremely happy and optimistic. From what I've read and seen (in pictures) over the past few days, their lives were lived in fear - unless they were a member of Saddam's regime, and even then, their lives weren't guaranteed. We cannot imagine living in that hell.

Keep our troops and the people of Iraq in your prayers. There are still those (mostly terrorists from outside Iraq) who do not want to see Iraq succeed and will do anything to stop progress.

As I said....we are so blessed!

Goofin' off in church

Get this....we have wireless internet access at our church, so right now, I am posting this entry from church! I'll bet there aren't many churches around with this capability! :)

Of course, my pastor will read this later on and I'll be busted. :)

We are studying about the Dead Sea Scrolls and it is very interesting. Randy (my pastor) acquired a copy of the scrolls (digital, of course!) and we're actually able to read the scrolls and learn all about them. I can't even begin to explain what we've covered - I just know it's cool!

Ok - he's picking back up now, so I'd better go!

I'm proud to be an American!!!

Ok, I didn't get to hear every word of the President's speech (because I got to browsing around online - more about that in a sec) but what I heard made me proud to live in the greatest country on earth! I plan on downloading his speech and reading over it carefully in the next couple of days. Right now, I'm just trying to keep from screaming at Pelosi and Daschle on tv. Aaarrrggghhh! Do these people honestly think that if they keep repeating lies and half-truths long enough the people of America will believe them? OR that they will become true? I am truly amazed at their gall.

Anyway......

While the president was speaking about the victories in Iraq, I remembered that I've been wanting to look up some Iraqi blogs. You know, from people who actually live there and see what is going on. I found quite a few and have already linked to several. It is amazing to read how many of them are grateful for US intervention and for the changes taking place in their country. You won't hear about this stuff from our national media!

In case you are interested, here are the blogs I've linked to already:

Healing Iraq - Daily news and comments on the situation in post Saddam Iraq by an Iraqi dentist

Iraq & Iraqi's - Short Articles about the Mentality of Iraqi`s

Iraq at a Glance - Stories and news from Iraq after the liberation

The Mesopotamian - To bring one more Iraqi voice of the Silent Majority to the Attention of the World

State of the Union

I'm just sitting here, watching our wonderful president give the State of the Union Address. I must say, as much as I love our president, I've been disappointed in a few things his administration has advanced over the past few weeks and months.

I'm looking forward to what he has to say!

A day off!

I'm so excited to have a day off! *happy sigh* We're about to get into a really busy stretch at work, so it's nice to have this kind of day thrown in there.

I had three of my brother's four kids spend the night with me last night and they just left! I love my nieces and nephew, but whenever I start to have a pity party about not being married or having kids, I just load my brother's kids up and spend some quality time with them! Then, I'm thankful I'm single!! Really though, I love those kids and they are awesome....especially when they say, "Kiki...(that's what they call me!), I love you! I love you this much..." and then they'll stretch their arms wide and grin at me. However, I've noticed a pattern for this behavior from them...it comes about the time they're getting in trouble for something.....hmmmmm. :) Just kidding! :)

Now I've got the rest of the day to start working on some projects I've decided need to get done. First of all, I've got to organize my books! I have a bunch.....most of which, I've not read! So, to help me get my "list" of "books to read" in order, I've got to organize them. I'm going to organize them by type of book and then author. I'll probably create a database of all the books I have, just to help me keep up with them.

The other project I have in mind is to organize my cd's! I have a ton of those as well that are scattered among several different cases. In addition to those, I have a bunch of new ones I've acquired over the past year that need to be integrated with my old ones. I'll probably create a list of those as well.

Those are just a couple of projects I have in mind.

I know I sound like a freak with all this organizing and list making....but this is going to help me in several ways. The most obvious benefit of organizing these things is that it will help me straighten my bookcases and put things in their rightful place. I have several stacks of books and cd's that need a home.

Secondly, when my "stuff" is disorganized, it's a good sign that "me" is disorganized. My room is a direct reflection of what's going on within me. It's very strange how this works. I've noticed I can help keep the rest of the house clean and straightened out, but it is a struggle to clean my room. Same thing with me....I can keep up the outward appearances while inside I'm in turmoil. Interesting, huh? Cool thing is this...I've been cleaning my room! Slowly, but surely. :)

And finally, the other reason for organizing these things is to help me stay on a budget. "What?" I know, doesn't make sense at first glance, but let me explain. When I get these thing organized, I will then have a list of books and cd's that I haven't read or listened to. So, the next time I feel an urge to spend some money, simply because I want something to do....I will have these lists from which to pull for entertainment! Make sense? I've realized that I sometimes spend money, simply because I'm bored. Crazy....I know! So, in an effort to be a better steward of what God has given me, I'm going to provide myself with a way to avoid impulse spending. (Besides staying away from stores!)

So, with all that said...I guess I'd better get to work! I've got a water aerobics class at 4:45, so I've only got a little bit of time!

The Passion of the Christ

Well, I thought I'd add something to the multitudinous posts about this movie. As you may know, I work for a national sports ministry and one of our vice-presidents had an opportunity to see a private screening of Mel Gibson's movie. Here is a portion of the email he sent us about the movie:

Staff -

Last week, I had the opportunity to see a private screening of Mel Gibson's movie "The Passion" at the National Network of Youth Ministries Forum in New Mexico with 250 youth leaders. The movie is an account of Christ's last 12 hours, depicting the crucifixion.

The movie was riveting and numbing. It was a life-changing event for me as my eyes were opened to the depth of Christ's sacrifice. As a Christian for 28 years and one who has read and heard the crucifixion story hundreds of times, it was like the first time I had encountered it. It vividly reminded me that it is all about the cross. Anyone that sees the movie will be challenged with the reality of Christ's love for us. Bottom line - it is all about Christ crucified, and that is the story that needs to be told.

At the very start of the movie, you could see people weeping - seeing the brutality of what Christ went through for us. No one left dry-eyed! It is a remarkable movie that not only every follower of Christ must see and also the skeptics. I pray that millions of movie watchers will be touched and transformed by the power of Christ. As I watched in awe, I realized that this might be one of the greatest evangelical tools ever! My prayer is that God will be lifted up and lives WILL be changed. In the movie, you see people encounter Christ in various settings and each one is transformed - the soldier whose ear was cut off by Peter, Pilate's wife, Simon who helped carry the cross, and many others. Transformation at each encounter. I pray that people can encounter Christ in a fresh, new way as they watch The Passion.

The movie will probably be Rated R. I have read that Mel Gibson commented to the brutality, "If you read the Bible -- the whole thing is pretty much rated R!" In order to accurately depict the crucifixion, he needed to hold back nothing from the torture Christ bore for us.

When asked what Mel's goal is for the movie, he said, "I hope they watch the movie and want to read the Book!" ... "I hope they are changed."

He spent over 35 million dollars of his own money, risked the doors of his world being slammed in his face and when asked "why?" he has said, "It was time. I just had to do it. It was just time to tell this story." Pray for Mel and this project.

I cannot wait to see this movie. I get a knot in my throat just watching the trailers, so I know I'll be one of those sobbing in the theater while watching it. I believe every Christian should go and see this film. I have a feeling it will cause a lot of folks to examine their walk....it's already got me looking into mine. To think that the Son of God would endure that type of torture, just so we could be with Him.......*eyes tearing up, and lump in throat*

It will be interesting to see the impact this film has.

The first member of the X-Men?

This is an amazing story about a girl who apparently has x-ray vision.

You know how so much of the technology that appeared in Star Trek (the original series) has now come into being? I wonder if this girl's story is another example of movies coming to life? Interesting thought.

Confessing sin

I found this great article on confessing sin. Here is an excerpt:

Many Christians, including yours truly, struggle with admitting sins. We know our heavenly parent sees all, yet we act as if we can hide sins from Him. We know He loves us with an everlasting love, yet we choose to believe He could never forgive us. We simply don’t want to talk about it, preferring to ignore our sins. King David, in Psalm 32, indicates that ignoring our sins is detrimental to our health and vitality. David attests to the liberating power of confession in verses 2-5: "When I refused to confess my sin, I was weak and miserable, and I groaned all day long. Day and night your hand of discipline was heavy on me. My strength evaporated like water in the summer heat. Finally I confessed all my sins to you and stopped trying to hide them. I said to myself, ‘I will confess my rebellion to the Lord.’ And you forgave me! All my guilt is gone." David exclaims, "Yes, what joy for those whose record the Lord has cleared of sin, whose lives are lived in complete honesty!"

I don't know about you, but this is one of those things I struggle with. Like I said in my previous post, I don't want to admit when I'm wrong or when I've goofed up, or even when I need help. And yet, it's just like the author describes in her article - Jesus just wants us to confess so that He can get on with the business of cleaning us up so we can go on with our lives.

What an awesome God we serve!

No pain, no gain

Ok, so I didn't get up in time to make it to the 5:45 am Pilates class, BUT I still went and got in a good workout! I was there by 6:15 and had a great 45 min. of cardio and weight training. I will sleep good tonight! (Actually, I could do with a good nap right now!)

Anyway, my roommate and I were talking about workouts last night and I mentioned that the pain I was experiencing was good pain. I like this kind of pain. It lets me know that I'm working muscles that haven't been worked in a while and that if I keep at it, I will see a difference. As I was thinking about working out and physical fitness this morning, I was reminded of my spiritual fitness.

How many times in life do we experience pain in our walk with Christ? I'm not talking about those external circumstances which bring pain and sorrow. No, I'm talking about the pain that comes from growing in Christ - giving up an old habit or perception in order to have a mind more like Christ. Or how about those times when you're in the Word and, just like it says it would do, the Word becomes a mirror to reflect back to you the sin that is in your life? Yeah, you know what I'm talking about. Just like when we work muscles that have lain dormant for far too long, when we work our spiritual "muscles" there is some amount of pain that comes. It's that old self dying.

So...we should rejoice! Right? I hear the half-hearted replies: "sure...oh yeah, of course..." I'm with you! To be honest, I haven't rejoiced when God is working those things out of me. In fact, I get down right mad. I don't want to think that I need to be "fixed" or that my spritual life is "out of shape" - although I know good and well it is! (At least it's not as good as it could be!)

As I commit to working on my physical body, I'm going to refocus on my spiritual side as well. As I experience the pain and discomfort of tired and sore muscles and the pain of giving up things to "have the same mind that was in Christ Jesus", I will remind myself of the title of this post......"No pain, no gain!"

Real quick

Just wanted to post something for today. I went and worked out this afternoon....water aerobics. I love doing that! If you think it is easy, guess again! It can be challenging, especially when you're using styrofoam dumbbells. I am so tired! But it is a good feeling.

I'm plan on getting up early to go work out before I go to work. I found out today they have a Pilates class at 5:45 am and I want to try it out.

I am trying to get in shape. I've always enjoyed working out, but have never really committed to a daily regimen - or even a regular schedule. It is time I must! Since adopting a change in eating habits - trying to stay away from unnecessary carbs (especially white flour) and sugar - I have lost 20 lbs! Woohoo! I won't tell you how many I have yet to go, but suffice it to say it will take some time. Working out will speed the process up.

Nevertheless, I'm excited! I'm hoping that by sharing this with the world, I'll be more accountable to stick to my goals. I will definitely be keeping you apprised of my successes, and yes, my failures - which I hope to keep to a bare minimum!

Wish me luck! (Or just pray for me!!!!!)

...and then, maybe not

Well, I may have spoken too soon! Now my throat is scratchy, dry and hurts. I REALLY hope it is nothing! I'm thinking my discomfort might be a result of the medicine I took last night, but only time will tell.

Anyway, I'm just sitting around watching the movie "Emma", starring Gwyneth Paltrow. It is quite a funny movie based on Jane Austen's book. What I didn't know was this - the movie "Clueless", with Alicia Silverstone, is also based on the story of "Emma". I must say, I haven't read the book (although now I plan to), but I have enjoyed both movies. *sigh* Another book to add to my list. :-)

Speaking of movies, I did finally get to see "LOTR: The Return of the King." All I can say is "wow". I must go and see it again, for I know I missed many things. I absolutely love those movies! I think the next time I go see it, I want to go by myself. That way, there are no distractions and I can give it my full attention!

False alarm!

Thank God!! I am not sick. Woohoo! I think yesterday was just a bad, wake-up-on-the-wrong-side-of-the-bed day. I'm feeling much better! Of course, drugs were involved, but hey - God works through those, too! ;-)

Looks like today is going to be a good one! At least, I pray it is!

If only...

You are going to marry Orlando Bloom. He will
always treat you right and is very romantic. He
will do anything for you. He is very polite and
has deep brown eyes and is very good looking
(which is another plus!). He can make anything
cheesy look really good (like sliding down
stairs on a shield shooting arrows or wearing
pointy ears for example). Congrats!!


Which male celebrity are you going to marry? (10 results that have pics!)
brought to you by Quizilla


In lieu of my post yesterday morning....this is not my definitive "list" for what I am looking for. Not even close.

Hey....let a girl dream, ok? :-D I just thought this was fun!

Yuck

After making it through the worst of the flu season, I fear I may be coming down with something. I feel like crap today. :(

Last night, I didn't feel so hot. In fact, I decided not to go to Winter Fest and see Audio Adrenaline, Relient K, Todd Agnew....and a whole bunch of other good artists....because I felt so crummy (and because I didn't really have the money!) In addition to that, my boss' wife had strep throat last week, and this morning I woke up with a sore throat. I hope and pray it is not strep! I do not like being sick.

Blah.

In spite of that, I praise God this morning...just because. I see His hand working in my life and the lives of so many others, and know that He has great things in store for us this year. I can't wait to see what He's going to do!

My pastor gave our "State of the Church Address" yesterday, and I am so excited and encouraged by what God is doing in our congregation. We've seen amazing growth this year (not just with numbers, but with lives changed by God) and anticipate seeing much more. I love the church I attend. The people are incredible.

Well, "Happy Monday!" and God bless. I guess I'd better get to work. :)

Stuff

Since I'm up, I thought I'd post something....anything. :) Seriously, though....I do like to post. Having a blog causes me to look deeper into things. When I remember I have a blog *grin*, I tend to look at every situation as an opportunity to share, so when I don't post....it usually means I'm just skating by and not really paying attention. I don't like that. I've been in a rut (so to speak) and I'm trying to get out of it.

One of the things that has been on my mind of late is relationships. Since I'm not in one at the present time, I get to observe a lot. I am confident of one thing....when I am blessed to be in a relationship, I definitely want God to be in the middle of it! Relationships are so tricky and man, can they be painful! I guess that's just life in general...right?

Anyway, I've got a friend dealing with issues in a relationship. Talking with her and listening to what she's going through has caused me to again look at what my expectations are in regards to a relationship. Sometimes I wonder if my expectations are too high....if I'm too picky. And then I'll read something like what Scott writes and think, "no way am I too picky!" I'm glad to know there are others with high standards and expectations.

I've told God many times, if I can't have a better than average marriage, I'd just rather stay single. I've seen too many "average" marriages, and they just don't appeal to me. I mean, if marriage is supposed to be an example of Christ's love for us, something is missing somewhere for a lot of folks. I can't imagine Christ treating me (or anyone) the way I've seen some husbands and wives treat each other. (I just hope that I'll remember that when I get married!)

Like I said...it's tricky, this relationship business. I just know I have to focus on my relationship with Christ and everything else will fall into place. However, I still have a "list" of expectations when it comes to "Mr. Right". Some of them may be unrealistic, but I'm trusting that as I get closer to Christ, my expectations will become what they need to be so I will recognize "him" when he enters my life. I can't wait to see how that turns out!

Changes

Life is full of changes. Of that I'm certain. They come in all shapes and sizes: expected, unexpected, turn-your-world-upside-down, make-your-world-right, they bring great joy or great sorrow, they hurt, feel good.....we all know about change.

The thing is, when change happens...things change. "Well, duh!" you might say, but have you ever really thought about it? I mean, look at some of these definitions:

1. To cause to be different.
   
2. To give a completely different form or appearance to; transform.
   
3. To exchange for or replace with another, usually of the same kind or category.
   
4. To lay aside, abandon, or leave for another; switch places.
   
5. To transfer from (one conveyance) to another.
   
6. To put a fresh covering on.
   

So, considering all these definitions, how do you deal with change? When it is the type of change that is unexpected or causes great pain, what do you do? What about change that is necessary, but still hurts? I could go on and on with different scenarios, but I'm sure you get the point.

The thing is, change always impacts more than one person. Even if the change taking place is within a person (i.e., they repent and give their life to Christ) it still impacts those around them. For instance, they no longer go out and "party" with the crowd because there's been a "change" in their heart. John Donne, poet and clergyman, once wrote: "No man is an island, entire of itself." Simple, but very profound. I think we all tend to forget that our actions will always affect someone else. That, in itself, is not necessarily a bad thing. It's just a very real fact of life.

I have a friend dealing with some change in her life, and yes, it impacts me and other friends of ours. Each of us, in our own way, will work through the process of dealing with this change, but I know God will work things out. He has promised that in His Word. In the meantime, I will walk with her through this change and try to help in any way I can. One of my all-time favorite scriptures is 1 Corinthians 2:9, which says, "No eye has seen, no ear has heard, and no mind has imagined what God has prepared for those who love Him." I can't wait to see how it all turns out!

Happy New Year!

I can't believe it - another year filed away! Where does the time go?

Just wanted to post something quick to say "Thank You" to all my new friends I've made in the blogosphere! I really am humbled to know that people find what I write interesting. I hope I can keep it up!

Since I stayed up way too late last night, I'm going to bed early tonight. Besides, I want to be fresh when I see "The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King" tomorrow! I can't wait! :) I'll post my thoughts about it after tomorrow!

Ta ta for now! :)

How time flies!

Well, folks, another Christmas has passed and we are fast approaching the end of another year. What happens to time? I can remember when I was a kid and the school year seemed to last for years and Christmas took forever to get here! Now it seems January hardly passes before it's July 4th and then you blink and Christmas has arrived. Sometimes I don't like getting older.

In spite of the speed at which the holidays have passed, I must say I'm glad it's over. This past week has been hard. I think I spent too much time alone. At times, I didn't even like myself, but that, too, is passing. :)

On a lighter note, there were several things I did during the holidays that were some of my own favorite traditions: decorating the tree, watching my favorite holiday movies - "It's a Wonderful Life", "Holiday Inn", "White Christmas", and baking pecan pies. I didn't get to watch Charles Dickens', "A Christmas Carol". My favorite version of that movie is the one with Patrick Stewart as Ebenezer Scrooge. George C. Scott is my other favorite "Scrooge". I did, however, see it live at the local theater. That was cool.

Should God allow it, I can't wait for the day when I have a family and we establish our own holiday traditions. To me, the family traditions are the best part of the holidays.

I hope you all had a wonderful holiday and enjoyed yourselves immensely! Most importantly, I hope you were able to think about the One who is the Reason for the season.

I'm back in business!

I got my laptop back!!!!! Woohoo!!!! I am so excited to have it back.

The speed at which Apple repaired my laptop has restored my faith in this company! I shipped it out on Thursday of last week and got it back on Tuesday. They totally replaced all of the outer casing - so my laptop looks like new! Except that my battery is a slightly different color, but I won't be picky about that! :)

Now I will try to get back in the groove of posting. I think not having my computer worked out for the best anyway - I wouldn't have had enough time to post anyway.

I'm going to sign out now, since I have some things to do before tomorrow, but I hope you all will have a blessed Christmas. Be sure to hug all those folks you'll be with this week - even the ones you might not like very much. We never know if this Christmas will be the last one we have with those we love.

Blessings to you and yours!

'Tis the season, to be jolly....

But sometimes it's hard! My laptop was fixed and returned to me - only to be sent back today! It is a long story. But here it is in a letter I wrote to Apple and sent with my computer:

To Whom It May Concern:
...

On the Tuesday before Thanksgiving, my laptop stopped working correctly. I took it the next day to a local Apple repair shop and they determined the logic board was bad and that it would have to be shipped to Apple for repairs. It was shipped on the Wednesday prior to Thanksgiving (November 24). I understood that with the holidays, it would be the following week before my computer would arrive at the repair center. The local repair shop was awesome at keeping me apprised of the status of my computer, but was at a loss as to why it was taking so long to get repaired. After a week and a half, the status on my computer indicated that the part was backordered. One of the guys at the local shop talked with someone at the repair center on Thursday, December 9, and was told that if the part had not arrived by Monday, December 15, he would put me in touch with Apple and they would talk with me about replacing my laptop. I called the local shop on Monday and they told me the part had been found and my computer had been repaired on Saturday, December 11 and that I should have my computer back by Tuesday, December 16 – almost three weeks to the date it had been shipped in the first place. Needless to say, I was just happy to get my laptop back.

I called on Tuesday, December 16, to see if my laptop had made it back, and sure enough – it had. I went to get it and was very dismayed by what I found. After I had checked to make sure the data on the computer was mine, the guy from the store closed my laptop and I was treated to the first view of the outer casing on my laptop. First of all, some tape had been applied and removed and in its place was a huge spot of tape glue. Not only that, there were other scratches and marks on the outside that were not there when I shipped it for repairs. They guy used some “Goo Gone” to remove the tape glue and then cleaned the top of the laptop, however, there were still many marks on my laptop that were not there the last time I had seen it. Unfortunately, I was running out of time on my lunch hour and had to leave before giving my laptop a detailed once-over. When I got back to my office and was able to really look at it, I was even more dismayed by the overall appearance of my laptop.

In addition to the scratches and marks on the top of my laptop, there were scratches to the bottom of the case and some of the seams of the laptop – the places where the different parts of the case come together – were warped or had gaps. For example, looking at the front of the laptop with the top down, near the clasp, the seam where the top of the keyboard meets the bottom of the case has a gap and looks like it was forced together. Also, when looking at the front of the laptop with the top down, the screen is warped, and does not close like it did prior to being “repaired”.

From a consumer’s perspective, it seems that when talk turned from repairing my computer to possibly having to replace it, the part suddenly appeared and my computer was “thrown together” to get it back to me. I feel that I am a reasonable person and that I was very understanding about the amount of time it took to repair my computer. However, I am severely disappointed in the treatment of my laptop. In my opinion the technicians should have treated it with more care than it was afforded. Now, I have to send my laptop off again for who knows how long to fix what wasn’t broken in the first place.

...

Well, that about sums it up. Can you tell I was/am frustrated? I don't think I'm being unreasonable.

I must admit, though, after dealing with this yesterday, I was quickly reminded of how stuff like this isn't really that important when there are people who are hungry or homeless or family-and friend-less. I have been so blessed in every other way, I truly cannot complain.

So.....my holiday will still be jolly and happy because I have family and friends who love me and whom I love. I hope you do, too!

Holiday....whatever?

Is anyone else feeling like you just wish you weren't at work? Not because you don't like the job or the people you work with (although I do have some friends in that situation) but simply because the holidays are drawing near and you'd just rather not be in the office.

I'm telling you, it is a struggle for me. I do love my job and the people I work with, but I do not want to be sitting here at this desk working. I feel like I need to be "out there" doing something other than what I'm doing. I think it is a result of years spent in school, counting down the days until the Christmas break, which lasted for two weeks. Two whole weeks of doing nothing. Then once Christmas break was over, you knew it was back to work. It's funny....once the new year rolls around and I put up the Christmas ornaments and clean the corner where the tree now stands, it will be back to business as usual. Just like when I was in school.

Part of my apathy this time, is a strong desire to go and be somewhere where God and I can be together. I'm working through some things in my mind and I'd like to just go away from everyone and read the Word and talk to God. Maybe I should take a day off and do that anyway. Hmmm.....

Anyway, thought I'd post something during one spell of apathy here at my desk. Still no news on the iBook. It could be the end of this week or even next week before I get it back. *groan* I'll survive, I suppose.

iBook Update

Well, it could be the end of next week before I get my laptop back. *sigh* They are having to replace the logic board, and apparently, many other people's as well. Seems like they had a generation of bad logic boards and now they are on backorder. All I know is, I miss my 'puter!

In spite of being Mac-less, life has been busy. As I said, I knew this week at work was going to be crazy, and sure enough - it has! The only reason I'm getting to post something is because no one else is in the office right now. I finally finished our newsletter and other items we have to get printed to mail out. Whew! I need a vacation!

Hope everyone had a wonderful Thanksgiving! Ours was fantastic! We had 10 people at our house on Thanksgiving. The food was great, but the fellowship was even better. I'm just so thankful to God for all of His blessings in my life.

Last night, me and Deedee picked out our Christmas tree. I know she probably wanted to kill me. I'm so picky and all she wanted was a tree. We did meet in the middle and found a really cute tree for only $30!!! She was excited to find one cheap and I was glad to get a tree I actually liked. Her boyfriend, James, helped us get it to the house. He is just an awesome guy. I'll be sure to post pictures of the Christmas tree. (I know I missed getting pictures of the pumpkins at Halloween, but the tree will live longer than our pumpkins did!)

Anyway, this weekend is going to be crazy - oh the holiday season! It's Christmas-time in the city! I'm leading worship at a church "lock-in" tonight, but then I'll have to leave around 2am to make the hour-long drive home so I can grab a couple hours of sleep before I have to get up and be in a Christmas parade (with our motorcycle ministry) first thing in the morning. Needless to say, tomorrow is going to be interesting! I'm already tired thinking about it. On top of that - we have to decorate our tree sometime!

I hope your weekend is fun for you! Until next time.....

I've been grounded

Alas, my friends, I am an artist without a paintbrush....my Mac has been sent in for service work. Honestly, it breaks my heart to even say that, seeing as how wonderful Mac's are. One would think they are invincible. Apparently, they are not.

My iBook gave up the ghost after a brief struggle that began yesterday. It seems that there is some problem with some part of the hardware, so it is being sent back to Apple to be fixed. Fortunately, it is still under warranty!! Woohoo!!!

Unfortunately, I won't have a computer for about 2 weeks! Aaagghhh! This means posts will be few and far between. (This is a busy time at work, so even getting online there will be hard!)

I know that there is a lesson in this. God is again using an event in my life to remind me that He is my source and everything I need. Just this past Sunday, our pastor shared from the scripture in 1 John 2:15-17 about "loving the world." From that, he brought out the fact that anything we value or love more than God reveals that His love is not in us. Ouch! Here, again, the harsh truth of the Word cuts deep.

It is really easy to get caught up in desiring and loving the "things" of this world. Before you start yelling, I'm not saying it's wrong to have things, but whenever they take our attention from God and what He wants to do in us and through us, we should give them up or at the very least, examine our attitude about those things and see how they line up with His Word.

I plan on using this time to focus my attention on Him and what He's speaking to me. Not only that, since this is the Thanksgiving holiday, instead of bemoaning the fact my computer is absent, I'm going to focus on what I do have to be thankful for. Perhaps I won't even miss my computer!

I just love these things!

You are Psalms.


Which book of the Bible are you?
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There's no place like home!

"Toto, I don't think we're in Kansas (City) anymore!"

I am so glad to be back! Actually, I was home Thursday night, I've just been too busy to post.

Anyway, there is truly no place like home. I don't know if I feel that way because I'm becoming more of a homebody as I get older, or if I just truly love my home. I enjoyed my trip - we had fun and it was great seeing everyone from the Home Office - but after the second day, I was ready to come home! I missed my bed and my dog! :)

I've often wondered if I should have tried moving away from my hometown - either to go to college or to take a job in another state. I mean, I'm single, I have a degree in Accounting (although I'd probably have to go back to school for some refresher courses) and no real "thing", other than my parents and siblings, to tie me down. As a matter of fact, I have a standing offer with the Home Office for a job, should I decide to move there. "There" being Kansas City. They usually say it joking around (because they know I'd never leave my current job) but they are serious about the offer. It's nice to know people like you and want you around.

In spite of that, I am still here. I like being here. I love my house and my roommates. My church is fantastic. And, I truly enjoy my job and love the people I work with. On top of that, God is opening some doors for ministry - I've made some new friends at a local coffee shop and I'm looking forward to how God can use me to minister to them.

I guess, like Dorothy in the "Wizard of Oz", I realize that I don't need to go off to find happiness. Everything I need and love is right here. And that's just fine.

Enjoying Kansas City!

Just caught a few minutes and thought I'd post something. Unfortunately, we don't have internet access at our hotel (what's up with that?) so I'm writing this live from our home office.

When I arrived Monday, I found out that I would have to present the Devotional on Tuesday morning, so I was up late Monday night pulling something together. It ended up being about worry - which as an admin assistant can be a constant companion. It was really cool, because the devotion was as much for me as for any of the other ladies. I used the passage in Matthew 6 where Jesus is talking to the crowd about not worrying about our needs. If He can keep up with the birds and the flowers, how much more does He care for us? It was really good. I think just having to dig into the Word like that was good for me. A couple of ladies came up and thanked me for the devotion, so at least it blessed someone else, too!

Anyway, we're having a great time. This class of admin's is very small and very quiet! They are really nice women, but not very lively. I think I'm the liveliest in the bunch, besides the other trainer from Florida - who is a close personal friend and my roommate here. Life is just too short to be dull!

Hope life is treating everyone well. I'll be home Thursday night, so hopefully I'll be able to post some other stuff then.

Biker chick!

Well, it's official - I am now a member of the Soul Searchers Chapter of New Beginnings Motorcycle Ministry. Not only am I a member, they elected me Secretary/Treasurer. How's that for an interesting bit of news?!?!?

I was voted in on Friday night as member and officer and received my colors (back patch). I had my cloth patch sewn onto my denim jacket and it looks sharp!!! I've got to get a leather vest for my leather patch. The only thing is - I don't have a bike. Yet. :) I am working my way towards getting a motorcycle. It will probably take a year or so, but, Lord willing, I will have one! I'm not sure what I want - my first inclination is for a Harley Davidson. When people ask what you ride, I think it just sounds better.....Harley Davidson. Don't you? I will say this, my pastor has a fine Yamaha V-Star Custom 650cc and I would consider getting one of those, too. Anyway, I can't afford one right now, so I'll just be "window shopping" for a while.

In other news, I'll be leaving for Kansas City tomorrow morning. I'm going to our Home Office for New Staff Training. I'll be "training" new Administrative Assistants. This is my third year to go and I just love it! If I have internet access in the hotel we're staying in, I'll try to keep up with my posts. If not, I'll try to squeeze one or two in somehow.

Y'all have a blessed week and God bless!

Music to my ears!

I'm excited! I finally moved my piano from my parents house to my house. I have missed being able to sit down and play whenever the urge strikes. Playing the piano is therapeutic for me. When I have a stressful day or just need to relieve some tension, I'll pull out some old sheet music and play away.

Music is also my main venue of praise and worship to God. That includes playing my piano, singing or just listening to music that speaks to my heart. I sense His presence more when I'm into my music and whenever I need to pour out my heart to Him, I can do it much better through music than words.

Tonight I had the house to myself so I spent about an hour just piddling around on my piano. I was made painfully aware how out of practice I am. This is particularly strange since I'm the pianist for my church, but what I play on Sunday is a whole different ball game from Franz Schubert or Scott Joplin!

My piano is just a Lowrey console, nothing really special, except that I've had it since I was about 9 years old. (That's 21 years! Yikes, I'm getting old!) Anyway, I love the sound and feel of a real stringed piano, but I'm considering getting a digital. They are so much easier to move and I can plug earphones into one and play whenever I want to without disturbing anyone! Especially a plus if you have roommates!

In the meantime, I will take advantage of any opportunity I have the house to myself to work on some music. (I have one piece that has been requested by my pastor for an offertory that I must learn soon.) That way, no one else has to endure my mistakes as I work out the kinks!

Which Matrix character are you?

You are Trinity, from "The Matrix."
Strong, beautiful- you epitomize the ultimate
heroine.


What Matrix Persona Are You?
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Just who I would want to be like from that movie!

I saw Jesus today.

Have you ever met someone who, without any doubt, is in tune with Christ and His heart? Fortunately for me, I work for one of those people.

Now don't get me wrong, there are days when I'd rather not be at work - usually that's more because of me and my attitude than the people I work with - but there are those days, few and far between though they are, that I just don't want to be in the office.

Putting all that to the side, my boss is one of the few people I have ever known whose heart is truly tuned in to what Christ is doing. In case you don't know, I work for a non-profit sports ministry, so of course, I work in a decidedly Christian environment. I get tickled at my boss, sometimes, for the way he will "corner" people and ask them about what they know of Christ and whether or not they have a relationship with Him. Usually when he does that, and I'm around, I think to myself "man, I could not do that!" and then proceed to justify myself with some mumbled thoughts of "you can't force the Word on people" or "I think you should build a relationship first. People don't care how much you know until they know how much you care." The fact remains, Bill is willing to share Christ - no matter what. Wow!

Well, he did it again today. A woman called our office looking for some financial assistance. She had lost a child a month or so ago and also lost her job, so she can't pay her rent or utilities this month. I talked with her for a minute and was, of course, skeptical that she was telling the truth. So, I put her on hold and then went to tell Bill about her. He paused a moment and before he picked up the phone told me I could stay in there and listen. As I was sitting there listening to his conversation over the speakerphone, I was simply amazed. He started out asking for some specific information from her: name, address, phone, last few places she worked, etc. Then, he does what he's good at, and began to ask her about her faith and relationship with Christ.

As I sat there, I began to think of the verse in the Bible where Peter was walking into the Temple and passed by the crippled man begging at the temple gate. He looked intently at the man and said:

"Look at us! I don't have any money for you, but I'll give you what I have. In the name of Jesus Christ of Nazareth, get up and walk!" Acts 3:4-6

Peter wasn't concerned with giving the man money to make it another day. His concern, besides bringing glory to Jesus, was to meet the deeper need of this man. He saw an opportunity to give this man something more valuable than money to meet one day's needs. Peter gave him something that would last through eternity.

I was convicted for all the times I had helped people without first talking with them about their eternal soul. What does giving money or a helping hand or even "being a friend" do for someone who is walking the thin line between eternal life and eternal hell? Every day we encounter people who just need to know that there is a God in heaven who loved them so much, He gave His Son to die so that they could know Him intimately.

The rest of the story is this - Bill walked this woman through several scriptures in the Bible and just shared Christ with her. She prayed a prayer of confession and repentance and gave her life to Christ! Just like that! It was beautiful. Now that her soul's need has been met, we get to work on the other needs she has.

She's coming to the office tomorrow to meet me and hopefully one of the other guys in the office (since Bill won't be here.) We're working on helping her with finding a job and meeting the financial needs she has, so if you think about it, say a prayer.

Stop the world, I want to get off!

Is it just me or is life really speeding up? Man, I tell ya - it seems like it was just January 1st and here we are in November! As fast as time flies, I'm sure I'm missing something!

Anyway, we had a busy weekend. Our house is finally complete! Deedee and I drove to Arkansas to get a washer and dryer from her dad. (Adam, we were in your neck of the woods!) It was an all day trip, but we are now able to wash clothes whenever we want to! Woohoo!

I'm still working through "A Call to Die" by David Nasser. It has really been an eye opener for me. I got off track a couple of weeks ago and was feeling guilty about being so behind, but God once again showed me how He works in everything. It seems like everyday I've read exactly what I needed. I can see where a couple of times, I wouldn't have been open to what God is trying to do if I had "stayed on track". God is good!

I also started reading a book by Bunny Wilson - "Knight in Shining Armor - Discovering Your Lifelong Love". It is fabulous! She encourages the reader to take six months, put a sign up (so to speak) that you are "Under Construction" and take the time to really get to know yourself and your True Husband - Jesus. It's kind of neat because I had already purposed in my heart to do just that. That was one of the reasons I began "A Call to Die". At the end of each chapter, there are questions to consider and activities to do, so I'm going to work through each of those as well. I am really excited by what God is doing in my life. I would encourage any single women reading this post to get that book. I read the whole thing last night, but now I'm going to go back and take time to work through each principle. She also has another book - "Liberated Through Submission - God's Design for Freedom in All Relationships". I started reading through that one and it is really eye opening as well.

Well, enough about all that. Today is beautiful and I am thankful to God for all He has done and is doing in my life. Here's a scripture for you:

O god, you are my God; I earnestly search for you. My soul thirsts for you; my whole body longs for you in this parched and weary land where there is no water. I have seen you in your sanctuary and gazed upon your power and glory. Your unfailing love is better to me than life itself; how I praise you! I will honor you as long as I live, lifting up my hands to you in prayer. You satisfy me more than the richest of foods. I will praise you with songs of joy! Psalm 63:1-5

Adding some new stuff

As you may be able to tell, I've added some stuff to my page. (Look to the right!) I've wanted to put some info about me on my website and just haven't had a chance to do it. I've also added a link where you can IM me directly from my website. (You need to have AIM installed on your computer for it to work.)

Anyway, let me know what you think! If there's something else you'd like to know about me, leave a comment. I might do one of those "100 things about me" lists. :-)

What a great weekend!

I had such a wonderful weekend. There wasn't anything exceptionally great about the weekend other than the fact that I really could sense God's presence in a way I haven't felt in a while.

One new thing I did was volunteer to serve at the local theatre. I worked the concession stand serving snacks and drinks. I had fun, got to meet some really nice people, see a good play and to top it all off - was groped by a 70 year old man! That was definitely a first for me! I don't know if he realized he touched my butt, but touch it he did! Needless to say, I was shocked, but not really offended. I mean, the man had been drinking and just seemed to be excited about being there. (He was also a volunteer.)

Anyway, back to the original point of this post. I have really been on the "mountaintop" in my walk over the past few days. I have come to appreciate these times. It gives me an opportunity to look back at where I've come from and examine all the things God has brought me through and has been trying to teach me. He has blessed me in so many ways, I could talk about it for days.

One thing I've learned I need to do while on the "mountaintop" is gear up for the next valley. Because...they always come. The good thing is (at least for this moment) I don't fear the next valley experience as much as I used to. I believe I'm learning to trust God more (I've been working hard at it), and so when those dark times come, I'm going to trust God. I know the valley does not last forever. I'll come through it, because I have before.....because He's brought me through before. Of course, I am speaking from the "mountaintop" right now!

I don't mean to sound like I've got it all together, because at this point in my life, I've just begun to realize how un-together I am - but I do sense a change in me. I'm still working through that Bible study "A Call to Die", and the other day, I was reading about going through dark times. As a young Christian, dark times can be brought about by the sin that is in our life. However, as we mature in our faith, there are dark times we experience because God is wanting to test us - to see where we are in our faith. As I read this particular day's devotion, I really began to examine where I've been in my walk and what were the lessons learned from the dark times I've already experienced. I believe most of them so far have been because of sin in my life, which is kinda scary! That means I haven't been through a time of "testing". You know - the kind that results in those really dark times. I know it's coming and I'm trying to prepare. I think I'm more scared of failing the test than actually going through it.

What if I am found lacking in some way? What character flaw in me will be revealed? What will become of me? What will people see when I go through the test - God or me?

As I read these questions, I realize just how self-centered they sound. Part of me doesn't want to be shown in a bad light or come up short - as most people would agree (if they're honest!) But - there is another part that doesn't want to bring shame upon God's name. I want to be an example to others that, "yes, you too can make it and be full of joy and peace!"

I've tried not to dwell too much on the fact that valleys and dark times of testing are inevitable. I'm just trying to prepare - filling myself with the Word and listening to God's voice. I want to be able to hear Him when He's speaking in that "still small voice" and for those times I can't hear Him, I'll know His voice anyway because of His Word that is in my heart. I just want Him to be proud of me!

Finger Update!

Well, good news - I'm almost back 100%!!!! Almost!

My finger is/was broken, but not like one would think. I went to an orthopedic doctor on Tuesday and had him check it out. He told me that when my finger bent backwards (when I hit the floor!) the ligament in my finger had a good hold on the bone and basically pulled a small chip of the bone off. Ehhh! So it wasn't like the bone was broken in half or anything. THANK GOD!!!! I don't think I would have been able to handle a seriously broken finger!

I don't think my church would have liked it too much either, since I'm the pianist! It would have been terrible to sing to taped music.

Anyway, I am using all 10 fingers to type this post. My "broken" finger is still very stiff and sore (from the tissue damage more than the bone chip) and is colored a lovely mix of purples, greens and yellows. Fortunately, the bruising is fading away. I'll be glad when I can bend my finger and not notice!

Shout outs

I just wanted to post a quick thanks to all of those who visit my site on a regular basis or who have my site listed in your links. I appreciate you!

Here are a few new links I've added to my website that I think are interesting.

Jax of Jax Place

Ailina of Paperbent and Lordside

Neely of Unquenchable Songs & Endless Praise

And last, but not least:

Joshua of VoxJoshua

Check them out if you get a chance!

Another first

I must say, I do not like getting older! Up until last April, I had never broken a bone in my life, and now within a year and a half, I have broken two!

Today, I broke my finger. And not just any finger. No - due to my injury, I am sure to offend someone because of the stigma attached to a fully extended middle finger. I cannot help it.

"So, Christy, how did you break the aforementioned finger?" I'm sure you're all dying to know. Well, that's what makes this story even better! I told the lady at the ER business office that when I injure myself, I make sure there's an interesting story to go with it, otherwise, what's the point, right?

Anyway, here's what happened: Deedee cooked a fabulous lunch - steak, grilled vegetables and mashed potatoes. (Her boyfriend helped her with the grilling.) Anyway, we were sitting in the living room, eating lunch. Deedee's boyfriend was sitting on the floor. Everyone was tossing my dog the fat and gristle from their steaks, so she was walking the floor, waiting to see what else was coming. Well, James looks away to say something to Deedee, and Sheba walks up and grabs his steak off of his plate. I couldn't believe it! So I scream at Sheba and walk over to her to grab the steak from her. At the same time, I go to pop her on the head, and she moves! So instead of popping Sheba, my hand makes contact with the hardwood floor. After that, I didn't care about the steak, Sheba or anything else. That hurt!!!!! After about an hour, and my finger doubling in size, I decided to go get it checked out.

The good news is, I was in and out of the ER in an hour and a half. The bad news, of course, was that I had fractured my finger. The doc told me I had chipped the bone. Tomorrow, I'm going to try and see an orthopedic doctor to make sure there's not any worse damage. After all, I work on a computer every day and play piano for church. My fingers are precious to me!

So that's the drama of my day. As I sit here working on this entry, I'm getting better at typing. I think I'll make do at work. We'll see how I fare at the piano next Sunday!

Everything I ever needed to know about life, I learned from my dog.

Last night, I was reminded of a valuable lesson - trust.

I gave my dog, Sheba, a bath. She hates getting a bath. Even though she always needs them by the time I give her one, she simply hates getting one. When the bath is over, I have to wrap her in a towel and hold her tightly to dry her off. Otherwise, she makes a mess. She'll run all over the place, spraying water and hair over everything and then will make a running dive into the nearest carpet to begin the "Doggie Shuffle". Anyone with a dog is sure to know what that is!

Anyway, we made it through the bath and because she was so good, I decided to give her a treat. So as I got the treat and was sitting on the bed, about to give it to her, I was reminded of how I respond to my Master when He has to "give me a bath" or when He wants to pour out His blessings in my life.

As I sat there, breaking up the cookie into small pieces, I watched my dog and how she responded to me. She sat there, totally focused on my hands and what was in them. As I gave her each piece, her eyes never left my hands. A couple of times I closed my hand with a piece of the cookie inside it, and just sat there, waiting to see what she would do. There were a couple of times she looked away - a car was passing by or a noise caught her attention - but she would always quickly turn back to stare intently at my hand, waiting to see what I was going to do.

It seemed like God was gently prodding me about my response to Him. How do I respond to Him when he wants to "wash me clean"? Do I just endure it, counting down the time until I can get out and run free? Or do I relish those times of cleansing and allow Him to do a thorough job? Am I as fervent in my devotion to "watching His hand"? Do I allow the distractions of this world to cause me to turn away from Him and perhaps miss a blessing or a ministry opportunity He has for me? Do I trust Him enough to simply wait for Him to move in my life? I was convicted, to say the least.

This is something I've been dealing with for a while. This, trusting God thing. I'm trying to figure out why it is so hard for me. It's sort of unfair, because He made me to be independent, but I'm supposed to lay that all down (dying daily to that sinful nature in me) and submit to Him. I'm not complaining, just trying to figure out how to do that. I'm sure a lot of my struggle is due to the sin of pride in my life. I've just recently recognized that I do have too much pride. It's hard when God gives you a good "scrubbing" by shining the light of His truth in your life.

The fact remains that I do want to trust God. To be broken and submissive to Him. Good grief, if I can't trust the Creator of the Universe, then whom can I trust? The hard part is getting to that broken and submissive place. To be the clay in the Potter's hands. To realize, truly realize, that without God, there is no point in going on.

I'm getting better - of this I'm sure! I'm almost beginning to look forward to the next bath!

Yes, Grasshoppa! A Ninja Story

Found this hilarious story over at Dave's site.

I almost wet myself laughing at it!

What kind of world do we live in?

I'm sure all of you have heard the name Terri Schindler-Schiavo in the news lately. Just today, after hearing her father on the Sean Hannity radio program, I went and looked up the website her family has about Terri's situation.

This is just unbelievable! The videos on this website of Terri and her reactions to several different stimuli is amazing. Her husband (who I believe is just evil) has refused any type of rehabilitative therapy for Terri ever since she received an award for a malpractice suit. Terri's father asserts that her husband had something to do with her "collapse" and that is why he doesn't want her to live. He must be afraid of what she would say if she were to start talking.

I only wish I had known more about this before now. Folks, pray for Terri and her family, and that God would intervene in this situation. Unless something happens (i.e., Governor Jeb Bush intervenes or God miraculously intervenes) Terri will slowly die of starvation.

There are several links on Terri's webpage for ways you can help. Who knows, a few more phone calls might make a difference.

Made some changes

Just so you know, I had to change my commenting feature, which means I've lost all the awesome comments left prior to today.

I'm sorry about that! I just got tired of my comments not being there from time to time. I've seen Haloscan being used by several other blogs and thought I'd give them a try.

Please feel free to go back and comment on any prior posting! It might be fun to see what people have to say about past posts!

In any case, I always enjoy reading your posts! I hope you'll continue to leave a bunch!

If only...

Have you ever been somewhere, and a person of the opposite sex walks into the room and so captivates your attention that you lose yourself for a moment (or two, or three....)? That happened to me today.

I was at my friend's office (I was just dropping something off to her) and this guy walks in for a meeting with someone else in her office. Well, when he walked in, I was just knocked over - so to speak. He is an attractive man and the first thing I thought was, "Lord, please let him be single!" Of course, the first thing I look for is a ring on that fourth finger of his left hand and lo and behold, it is naked! I'm thinking, this is good. Well, introductions were made and he asks me if I attended a particular college. I knew he looked vaguely familiar, so when he said he had also attended that school, that explained it. So he goes into the other office and then a few seconds later comes back out. When I introduced myself to him, I mentioned that I work for the Fellowship of Christian Athletes. He had come back out to ask me how he could get involved with FCA, so I told him I could get him some more information about it. He said ok and went back into the other office for his meeting.

Meanwhile, I'm standing there, praying to God that he is single. I mean, I've never been this rattled by meeting someone. It is very strange. Anyway, my friend gives me a piece of paper so I can write my name and office number down to give to this guy, so he can call me to get more info about FCA. When I finished, I jokingly said, "I'm leaving now, so when you give this to him, ask him if he's married. If he's not, tell him to call me!!!" We laughed at that (although I was dead serious) and then she proceeded to show me something on her computer.

All the while I'm standing at her desk, I'm thinking I need to get out of there before I do or say something stupid. Before too much longer, his meeting is over, so he comes back out and stands there and talks to the both of us for a minute. He then asks me where I went to high school. It turns out, not only did we go to the same college, but we had both attended the same high school. He graduated the year before I did. This explained further why he was familiar to me.

We were having a great conversation (I can tell he is a genuinely nice guy and committed to Christ). I couldn't remember much about him from high school (although, the more I think about it, I'm beginning to remember some things. i.e., he was a really nice guy in high school, too!) The good news is - he's a Christian! He shared a little bit about what God had done in his life and that was cool. The bad news is - he is separated from his wife (has been for a year) and has a four year old daughter. I was so disappointed!!!! I won't lie about it. He wants to reconcile with his wife, which is great! That is God's will, I know. At the same time, he said he is just trusting the Lord for his life and if it was God's will for someone else to come into his life, he was ok with that.

I'll say it again - I was disappointed. Here lately, I've really been thinking about dating and relationships and have begun to pray regularly for my future husband (whoever he might be), so the whole idea of meeting someone has been on my mind. I was rather startled at the intense reaction I had to this guy - it wasn't just a physical response like "oh my goodness, he's hot!" There was also a strong desire to want to know more about him. I don't think I've ever experienced that before. It got worse the more we talked, because he really has a great personality and I could tell he would be the type of guy I would definitely date.

So I left my friend's office (after he left) and start talking to God. Of course the most obvious argument I present to Him is "Why couldn't he have met me before his wife?" I immediately know the answer to that - God gently reminds me: "Do you remember who you were 7 years ago and what you've learned since then?"

"I know!" Then I proceed to throw a short pity party just a bit before I really get a hold of myself and begin to thank God that He knows what's best for me. I finally give it up and tell Him that I trust Him for bringing the right person into my life at the right time. I know He will. I just get impatient.

Nevertheless, this whole episode has caused me to consider what I would do if I met someone who was divorced and had a child. I don't think I would have as much a problem with dating a man who had been married and had no children with his first wife, especially if the guy was a dedicated Christian and had done everything in his power to try and reconcile. But to consider someone who was married and had a child....I just don't know. This guy would make me wonder about it (if he were available and were interested in me, that is!)

To any of you reading this who are divorced or are in a situation similar to this, please don't think this is a judgment on you or your life. I'm just writing about my feelings and experiences. I know that there are certain things I don't want, and until God changes my mind, that's the way I feel. Being involved with someone who is divorced with children is one of those things I don't think I could do. But - I'm not sure.

I'm just glad that God is in control. I truly trust Him for this area of my life and can't wait to see what He brings about. I'm just keeping my eyes and ears open, so that when He directs, I will follow!

A beautiful day!

I just love it when God blesses us with beautiful weather! Fall has finally and officially arrived!!!! Woo hoo!! I saw it when it came. It was the coolest thing!

I was driving to my house after going by the bank and could actually see fall arrive. Let me explain: this morning when I woke up, the sky was overcast and it was muggy outside. Not really hot, but just yucky. Well, when the front was moving through, you could actually see where the clouds ended and the blue skies began! It was cool! By the time I got to my house, there was a wind out of the north, blowing through the trees and you could just feel fall arriving! It was fantastic! I was so excited and the rest of my day was just great! This is my absolute favorite time of year!

In other news....I am really enjoying this Bible study - "A Call To Die". Well, enjoying may not be the right word....but it will do. I know one thing - I am learning a lot about myself. (I think I said that in another post.) It has been very revealing - and not always easy. I believe that God is about to do something in my life, or allow something big to take place. I only wish He would give me a "heads up" about it. Well, I guess He is - I know that I am supposed to be preparing for whatever it is by spending time in the word. I need to take some time to just "listen". I'm not real good at that.

Anyway - my battery is about to die and I'm getting cold sitting here at Cups, so I guess I'll go for now. I'm going to go home and open some windows! :)

One other thing...

To all my fellow bloggers whose sites I used to visit on a regular basis (and you know who you are).....

I have not forgotten about you! I miss you terribly and feel so out of touch since I haven't been able to read your sites and post comments to your pages.

Don't forget about me or give up on me! I'll be back in full force in a couple of weeks! (Lord, willing!)

Watch out blogosphere, here I come!

Found some time

Here I am again at a local coffee shop, Cups, so that I can post to my website. I am tired of not having internet at my house, but it will be a couple of weeks before it gets hooked back up. Waiting for the next payday.

Finally got most of my money from Meagan's paycheck fiasco. I hope to get the rest of it by tomorrow. It's not a moment too soon, since my car insurance will expire on Monday if I don't get a check to them. (That's another result of the money problems caused by Meagan's paycheck bouncing.) Anyway, it is about to be resolved and God has still been faithful through it all. I am glad I know Him.

Speaking of God....this Bible study Deedee and I are doing is kicking my tail. I've come to realize it is a good thing...but VERY difficult! In my previous post, I mentioned that God is dealing with me on some issues in my life. It has been difficult to come face to face with these issues. The one thing I am more certain of than ever, is that I need a Savior. I thought I "had it together" on a lot of different things. That was one of my main problems. I had become comfortable with me the way I am, but what I am is still way short of Christ's standard. Darn. I'm just thankful for my Savior and for the grace and mercy that was provided to me by His sacrifice.

A scripture I've had to memorize for this study is Galatians 2:20 - "I no longer live, but Christ now lives in me. So I will live my life in this earthly body by trusting in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me." I've read that scripture before (as I'm sure most people have) but it definitely has more meaning now. I am awed and amazed at the price Jesus paid for me. The least I can do is to trust Him. (Another one of my incredible shortcomings!) It isn't easy, but I'm getting better at trusting Him.

Checkin' In

I got an opportunity to be online, so I thought I'd post something really quick.

Deedee and I have started the study "A Call to Die". It is really bringing out some things in my life that I've never dealt with before. As hard as it is, I'm glad to be doing it. I've gotten tired of my spiritual life as it is and so it is worth whatever cost to be able to know Christ better and be more real with myself.

My pastor pointed something out at church last night that I had never considered or realized. He said that the Bible is a mirror that shows us our shortcomings and failures - our imperfections. For example, I may have never known what envy is until one day, I read about it in the Bible. All of a sudden, I realize - I have been envious of my friend. Now I know of a shortcoming in my life. The good news is, we have hope in Christ! There is redemption! Thank God for Grace!

Anyway, what I realized is this: I had been reading the Bible looking for a "good feeling" so to speak and not for the the hard truth. Not for the Word that cuts like a two-edged sword. I have been avoiding those parts that point out my shortcomings. Those parts that would really cause me to examine my life and that would eventually make me more like Christ.

Needless to say, it hasn't been "fun" exactly. I've been looking hard and long at my life. I'm not sure what I think right now, but I know that God is working something out in me and I can't wait to see what He can make out of this mess I am. :)

I have not forgotten

that I have a blog! I just do not have internet at my house for a while.

It is a crazy story!

Here's the deal: one of my roommate's paycheck bounced! Can you believe that!?!?!?! She has been going absolutely crazy trying to get this mess straightened out. As a result, she has had hundreds of dollars in NSF and returned check fees (which she will recoup from the company she works for). It has affected all of us - she wrote checks on behalf of her sister (who was out of checks at that time) and also wrote me a check for some money she owed me. Needless to say, it screwed my bank account up and I have been winging it until payday (which is tomorrow - thank God!)

So.....our cable and internet access was cut off because of this fiasco. It will be a few days until I get the hi-speed internet connected. We've decided not to get cable for the time being. One reason is we are trying to save money; the other reason is, my roommate Deedee and I are starting a daily devotional titled "A Call to Die" by David Nasser. One of the things it suggests for the study to be effective is to commit to fasting from something for the 40 days it takes to go through the book. Deedee and I both feel like TV is what God is calling us to fast from. I haven't tallied the total hours a week I've spent watching tv because I'm scared to know how much of my time has been wasted in front of the tube.

Anyway, this is one of the goals I had in mind when I posted this article. I still haven't taken the time to write out my list of goals, but I will be able to do that now that I'm fasting from tv!!! I'm excited about this study and will share my experiences about what I learn.

Not much to say

As you can tell, I haven't had much to say. I've been busy but more to the point, I've been putting off some things that would greatly increase the number of posts. Namely - I've been avoiding dealing with some personal things. But more on that later.

The family is doing well. Roomates are doing good - although there's been some drama for Meagan. I've got to make sure it's ok with her to post about it, but right now is not a good time for it. If you're looking for something to pray about - pray for her about her job. She could really use some Divine intervention!

Anyway, I'll be housesitting for the rest of the week, so I might try to write some things at night and then actually post them when I get to work. Hopefully I can do some catching up.

Later!

What a beautiful day

It sure was a beautiful day today. I wasn't outside for most of it, but the few times I was outside it was nice.

No, my day was beautiful in other ways. It was so good to be in the house of the Lord this morning with my fellow brothers and sisters in Christ. Then, I went to my mom's house and ate dinner with my family. After that, I washed clothes while watching a movie with my mom and dad. It was just a great day.

By the way, we watched one of my all time favorite movies - "The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers". That is a fabulous movie for discussing spiritual things. It (along with the first movie) are rich in spiritual applications. I highly recommend both of them!

Hope everyone else had a good day, too!

Don't you just love kids?

Ok, here she is - Trinity Cheyenne! Isn't she beautiful!!?!?! She is so tiny, too! I'm so excited by her birth and a bit sad. Excited because I get to love another wonderful child and be an influence in her life - sad because this will be the last opportunity for me to be an aunt for a while. If my youngest brother ever gets married and starts having children, I'll be excited.

I'm also a bit sad - but not too much - that I don't have any of my own yet. However, when I look at where I am and the life that I have, I can't imagine being married and having a family right now. God's timing is always perfect - even though it's usually not my timing. Still, His way is always the better way.

In the mean time, I'm living a full life - spending time with friends and family, working, writing for this blog (although I haven't been good at it lately) and spending time getting into God's word. I cannot complain.

I'm still here

I know it's been a few days since my last post, so I wanted to put a little something here for my regular readers. :-D

I was going to post a picture of my niece, but for some reason, Blogger isn't working right. As soon as I can, I'll post her picture. She is a doll!!!

Well, I need to run. Got to take care of some business this morning before I go in to work. There may be more on this story later on!

The last time...

I'll ever be an Aunt! (Unless my youngest brother gets married and has children.)

Yes, my brother and his wife had their fourth and final child yesterday - Trinity Cheyenne. (Ben wanted to name her Trinity Omega - since she is the third daughter and the last child. Shannon wasn't going for it!) I can't wait to see her later today!

Anyway, I got to play mom yesterday to my other two nieces and nephew - Hannah, Mackenzie and Nathaniel. I took off of work to stay with them and we had a good time! I must say though, it wasn't real fun when Hannah got up at 5:50 am this morning. I don't usually see that hour of the day! I'll be staying with them each night until my brother and sister-in-law get home with the new baby. The two Mamaw's are taking turns keeping them during the day today, tomorrow and Sunday.

In any case, I'll be busy for the next few days. If I can get a picture of Trinity, I'll post it. TTFN!

Goal setting

I came to the realization today, that I really don't have any goals that I am working towards. Well, to be honest, I can't say I just realized it today. I've known for a while. I guess I just had these amorphus plans for my life - you know....get married, have children, be a stay-home mom and homeschool, be an active part of the church body....those kinds of plans, but nothing really solid that I can work towards on a daily basis. Those plans I had for me are based solely on one event - getting married. Since that's not happening right now (or in the forseeable future) I realized I better have something else to focus my time on.

What's crazy is, I thought I had pretty good plans for my life. Hah! That's what I get for thinking. My desire to set goals has really been stirred by some of the messages my pastor has been sharing over the last few weeks. It came to a head tonight with our Bible study.

We're studying Hebrews - and boy is it loaded with good stuff! Tonight we were discussing chapter 5, verses 6 and following. Verse 8 is really what spoke to me: "So even though Jesus was God's Son, he learned obedience from the things he suffered." What? Jesus was God in the flesh, why did He have to learn obedience. Because He was in the flesh. He had to bring that fleshly body into submission. He learned what it means to have self-control.

My pastor made the comment that lack of self-control means there is a deficiency in your spiritual character. Sometimes lack of self-control is obvious - i.e., being overweight, addictions (drugs, alcohol), etc. Other times it is not. This is where it really hit home. I posted a little about this the other day. I have a lack of self-control and I believe it stems from not having set any goals.

Now, I know that self-control is included in the fruit of the spirit, but I also know that fruit won't grow if it isn't watered and fed. If I'm not spending time in the Word and getting to know Jesus, that fruit is going to die on the vine. If I don't have some goals or plans for getting into the Word, I won't learn or gain any self-control.

I need some structure to my life. So, I'm going to sit down and write out some goals for myself. I will pray over them and ask God to shine His light on areas that I need to focus on. I'm sure these goals will change as I go along, but at least I will have something to work from. I'm going to post them so I'll have some incentive to follow through on these goals (and hopefully some accountability from friends!)

If anyone else has done something like this or felt the need to do so, I'd love to hear your insights and experiences.

The one thing I draw hope from is the last part of that verse in Hebrews: "...He learned obedience from the things He suffered." Christ knows all the struggles I have. All the times I fight to bring under control a response or an action that is contrary to His will...Jesus fully understands. He's been there. I'm just barely beginning to understand how much He knows about my struggles and it is comforting.

This could be interesting!

I found this link over at Susan's webpage. Sounds like it could be interesting! I guess I'll be posting more stuff about Mississippi on here. Who knows what will happen!?!?!